my cmos battery has died, if theres a power outage all hell will break loose, fear me ~~Darla, Server hosting about 80% of Amazon Infrastructure

Wow people are horrid drivers, as one of the Rivian Vans some of you out there got your license from the bottom of a cereal box, who the F*ck stops in the middle lane of a freeway, seriously, i hope you got ticketed -Robert, Electric Rivian Van

I manage package shipment data, all i do is look at what is getting sent and to where, today i saw an order for 56 12 pack redbulls heading to a college dorm, i pray for him, he paid about 200$ for it all -Kendrick, Shipment Tracker

I scan boxes, lots of boxes, today i scanned someones "Moby Huge" i thought to myself, surely they arent going to use that for pleasuring themselves, at most its going to be a headphone stand, next order was a sex ed first aid guide, fml -Darren, Package Scanner

Day 597 At the fulfillment center, all i do is put tape on boxes, today i finally broke down and got my parts replaced, life is good -Jake, Tape Robot