I had no trouble admitting alcohol & food was more powerful than me. What was hard was believing that there existed a power stronger than those. I have to remind myself of that a lot.
Feeling terrible insecurity & anxiety tonite. We’re having lunch tomorrow with one of hubby’s best friends, who happens to be a woman. I admit I’m jealous & compare myself unfavorably w/her. *I’m* the third wheel. I’m very glad there’s no alcohol here. I might very well be 🥃
Like most addicts, I have a tendency to go it alone. Delegating is so hard for me. But HP helped me delegate a lot of this work for my move. And thank Goodness I did. I have a professional cleaning crew for once! 🎉
Pulled a tick out of the back of my neck today by accident. I was adjusting my necklace & thought a neck hair was caught on the chain and yanked. 😳 I was in the woods this morning. I am ever so grateful to HP that I found it - & so quickly. 🙏
Self-care, for me, is all about being proactive and designing a schedule for plenty of rest, exercise, and clean eating. If I live too much in the moment, I get self-indulgent. Combine that with anxiety and away I go! It’s not a good scene. 🤨
No detectable anxiety this morning. I never realized before how my self-harm, alcohol use, & compulsive eating are connected to my anxiety. All the more reason for or prayer & meditation. Most important part of my day!! #Recovery
Anxiety is a little better today. I was able to do a little professional development and a few errands. Hopefully i won’t need to take any more anxiety medicine. Easier to pay attention and open up to HP this morning.
My doc is prescribing the smallest dosage available of Klonopin. I’m to start by breaking them in half and only taking them when it gets really bad. I’m only getting prescribed a few. So I hope all these precautions are enough to not get dependent on it. I hope it helps.
My anxiety is always there, so much so that I really take note when it’s NOT there. I haven’t taken anything for it b/c I’ve been concerned about adding additional substance disorders. But it’s so severe right now, even 12 step work doesn’t calm me down at all. 😳