Whatever
Joined November 2009
- Tweets 7,138
- Following 898
- Followers 350
- Likes 612
155 Photos and videos
So you are saying commute time and lunch time are important and valuable…..you are sooooo close to getting it. Looking forward to when you are a CEO and you pay your employees commute time and have free lunches at the office everyday
May 27
If you're working fully remote, you should be taking a 20% pay cut. You aren't commuting, you aren't buying lunch, and half of you are doing laundry on company time anyway. Let's be real.
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Smart move getting this in on the 27th and not waiting until the 30th or 31st where it gets washed out in the flood of them by your kind. Looking forward to the for the oh so original “glad all the companies logos are going back to normal” tweet. Sorry, rainbows bother you
May 27
Is every company gonna plaster a pride flag over their logo come June 1, or have we evolved past that shit?
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Measles
May 20
Next week I’m headed to Tokyo to meet with the X Japan team.
What is the most American thing I can bring them?
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While I understand what you are saying, it is in fact a strike because it crossed the STRIKE ZONE. If we do it the other way we now are asking the umpire to 1. determine if it crossed the zone and 2. determine if it was some subjective distance to the glove set-up
May 19
I genuinely don’t give a fuck what the ABS system says … that ain’t a strike.
You shouldn’t be able to miss your spot THAT BADLY and still get the call for strike three.
What are we even doing?
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No, absolutely not. There is 100% chance that I wait until tomorrow. I’ll quit that shit at 5:30am, noon, 5pm, 11:59pm, whatever. The second those $$$ are mine.
Apr 20
Be honest for a second: would you quit your job tomorrow if you won $15M in the lottery today?
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Happy “dead heat day” to everyone in the #Sportsbook industry. Trying to explain this rule to once a year golf bettors is the worst. #Deadheat
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The casino I work at in Council Bluffs, Iowa just played Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing” at 9:39 on a Monday morning. The only healing going on after this point will be taking place at the free clinic.
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Oh how the #Husker fanbase is about to start a new Luther Vandross conspiracy when #OneShiningMoment shows more Iowa highlights and especially the 4 defender long pass #MarchMadness
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He definitely knows about forcing himself upon people.
Trump: Chicago should call and say we would like help. New York should call. Los Angeles should call… We are going to have to force ourselves upon them.
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Danny Hurley might actually commit a crime against an official who puts Duke in the bonus with 14 minutes left in the 2nd half. #MarchMadness #UConn #Duke
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Not all “Fridays” are created equal: 9-5 today with tomorrow and next day off.
9:45: co-worker goes on like a real rant about the size of paper clips we have. Then all 4 foot 9 of her tore apart every low shelf and cupboard looking for a different size….paper clip. #WorkSucks
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10:15-10:50: sat next to co-workers for 30-35 minutes doing my work. Nothing.
Try to get up to deliver money & paperwork to cage. Somehow all 3 cashiers need money swaps at the exact same time. We have had maybe 6 customers. #WorkSucks
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12:28 Window has a touchscreen that does pivot. Customer had to see so he keeps asking to pivot screen until it is completely facing away from me. As he is reading off selections he stops “why aren’t you typing these in”
My very short answer: “now I can’t see”
#WorkSucks
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Jeep-with the kid and the live fish. No way is that kid singing that song in real life. And what the hell is he doing with a live fish out of water anyway?
Mar 22
What's the 2026 March Madness commercial you're already most sick of?
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Thoughts and prayers to the referees assigned to the UConn/UCLA game today. I hope they slept well last night because dealing with Dan Hurley or Mick Cronin is bad enough. Today it’s Hurley AND Cronin. It’s going to be a loooong day for those officials. #MarchMadness
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Bricktown in OKC doesn’t have enough Busch Light on hand for what’s coming Wednesday thru hopefully Sunday. #Huskers #MarchMadness
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Music man at Madison Square Garden played Biggie for visitors(UConn) intros and then Tupac for St. John’s the NYC team intros…..that should have been flipped around. #BigEast
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Braden Smith’s full under tee is greater than Sam Hoiberg’s sports bra today.
#Huskers #Big10Tournament
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