Rank of Captain bestowed by Colonel Sanders. Jets fan against my better judgement. Pepperoni and sausage calzone expert. Movie guy.

Joined September 2021
134 Photos and videos
Doesn’t bother me that Jets have no primetime games tbh. But the idea that we have NFL schedule makers who make schedules based on storylines like it’s reality tv instead of a sport is just laughable. Losers.
Mike North about the Jets (to @BrianCoz) not getting a primetime game on a conference call: "It's not just about primetime. It's also about the 4:25 national television window, still our most-watched window, but a couple 4:25 windows are going to be viewed more than any primetime game. (Jets don't have any 425 games, FWIW.) "Then relative to a team like the Jets, or the Cardinals, or the Titans .... that's what flexible scheduling is for." Said teams that play their way into better TV windows have the opportunity to be rewarded.
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Calzonie retweeted
The Ents showing up to take down Isengard
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16 Oct 2025
Winning mentality. Need more of this.
16 Oct 2025
Jermaine Johnson is asked about trade rumors: "I can't control that, I can control how I come to practice and how I'm available to this team. I can control how I look on Sundays for this team. All that stuff is above my pay grade."
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12 Oct 2025
I’m over the Justin Fields experiment. From all accounts, he is a good guy but he is not a good quarterback and he lost that game for the jets today. I believe he is also the one who messed up the last play of the 1st half. Bench him and put in Tyrod
What’s most maddening about this game is that guys were open. Often. Justin Fields lost this game for the #Jets. They had their chances. I don’t know how this happens in 2025. A passing attack with -10 yards.
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17 Sep 2025
I want AG to do well. As someone who did grow up playing football, some things can get overlooked and some players may do the dirty work and not get the stats or the credit. This is not one of those times and some of these players just flat out stink, it’s easy to see.
Aaron Glenn on Micheal Clemons: "Sometimes when you don't see a stat you feel like a player has done well but there's things we ask players to do that people don't understand. Everybody has ups and downs when they're playing but the things we're asking Mike to do, he's doing a good job at that."
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22 Aug 2025
After a bit of time off, I declare the Calzonie Friday mailbag to be officially open! Please send over all you questions, takes, and legal threats! #ZonieMailsItIn
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30 May 2025
In honor of the first post Memorial Day Friday, I declare the Calzonie Mailbag open! Tweet over your questions, hot takes and cocktail suggestions! #ZonieKnows #Mailbag
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22 May 2025
Another day, another dart. @justnfields ➡️ @J_Rey_11
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I work in a big corporate office with hundreds of grown adults. And yet every single day without fail, multiple people piss on the toilet seat and don’t even have the decency to clean it up. If you are one of these people, I hope you step on glass #ZonieRant
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22 Mar 2025
Best hitter I’ve ever seen
Chipper Jones discussing Barry Bonds. 🐐👑
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Absolute electricity here #ZonieKnows
Bill Raftery saying onions for three minutes straight is the greatest video to exist. The Siena double order is clearly his best onions call
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29 Jan 2025
This is the first time I’ve seen a picture of Keith Carter. We had Coach from Letterkenny’s slow younger brother out there trying to install a run game! Fuckin Embarassing!
Source: The #Jets have parted ways with offensive line coach Keith Carter. Aaron Glenn will make a new hire there.
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11 Jan 2025
Cowards
Japan has invented a beer glass that helps you to drink slower
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29 Dec 2024
Absolutely pathetic display by the Jets. Completely undisciplined team, who continue to trot guys out there that are not serious and/or suck at football (Michael Clemons). Shit rolls down hill as they say and we have the King of the Turds at the top. Sell the team Woody!
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19 Dec 2024
I think the frustration is with the frequent amount of negative stories of the same nature. Jets fans generally have not had an enjoyable team to watch in a dozen years. It’s another bad season, and fans are trying to enjoy any of small positives they can.
Jets fans: “Woody Johnson sucks and is an arrogant, incompetent owner.” The Athletic: “Woody Johnson sucks and is an arrogant, incompetent owner.” Jets fans: “WOW how could you say that??? You’re definitely making all of that up!” Never change #Jets fans, never change. 😭
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19 Dec 2024
We know Woody probably isn’t a good owner and meddles too much (that’s being generous). I just want to enjoy the football on Sundays the best I can even though it’s been ugly. These reporters are more interested in turning the team into a soap opera and that’s why I dislike them
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15 Dec 2024
Mark Schlereth is one of those announcers that I could go the rest of my life without having to listen to. I respect that he played professionally and was successful, but I personally just am not a fan of his commentary
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15 Dec 2024
Allen Lazard back to his old ways. Guy couldn’t catch a cold, let alone a football.
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Another week, another rushing touchdown directly at Michael Clemons. The fact that this guy still is getting reps in a lost season is the peak of incompetence. Would rather see literally anyone else in the game @JCaporoso @ConnorJRogers
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