I make a lot of money ruling the NFL. I enjoy watching great athletes take a knee in the endzone. This is a parody account. Follow me or I will fine you.
Joined September 2011
- Tweets 83,193
- Following 1,654
- Followers 14,749
- Likes 7,859
7,646 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
15 Sep 2025
First NFL coach to be fired?
16%
Callahan (Titans)
71%
McDaniel (Dolphins)
9%
Daboll (Giants)
4%
Canales (Panthers)
242 votes • Final results
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CaptainTouchback retweeted
Jun 13
Wyndham Clark repping the @USAHockey Jack Hughes sweater on the rink hole 🇺🇸🥇
The Canadian fans let him hear it 😂
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Wait…did that track announcer just say the horse I picked in some random Australian track had a heart arhythmia?
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CaptainTouchback retweeted
Jun 12
Me: “Soccer is gay and stupid”
Also me tonight when America plays:
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827,709
If you are disrespecting Nolan Ryan’s legacy over Miz…go jump in front of a train.
437
Watching some dad warm up throwing a half-hour for a coach pitch game. Idiot.
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If you go back to @czabe and First Team on Fox days, congratulations, you’re old. Now schedule your colonoscopy. Good news though, if you don’t know, you can listen to Czabe on his podcast @CzabeCast. Check it out.
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Thing #1237 wrong with the NBA: these coaches dress like slobs. Pat Riley and Chuck Daly wouldn’t let these hobos mow their yards dressed like that.
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Jun 8
Tom Brady has launched a new coconut water brand called "Good Nut" featuring the marketing slogan "It's a delicious mouthful."
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And to think we wasted over 30 years of Pete Rose’s life banning him from baseball and the HOF.
Jun 8
QB Brendan Sorsby has been granted his injunction against the NCAA.
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Strangers on a Train. #CrissCross
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LA…you get what you deserve. Blue or red…who cares. Your city has gone to absolute hell and you voted for more of the same.
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He’s bad. Everything about Fox’s coverage should be an embarrassment.
Jun 6
Menefee just called Saratoga Race Course "Saratoga Park."
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And since they are moving up post time of #BelmontStakes Fox has to cram in one more commercial break before the race.
389
Fox is just bad at this. Their hosts are bad. Their analysts are bad. Their production value is bad. #BelmontStake
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Great run by Carmouche on Deterministic, but it looked like he stood up a little early approaching the finish line.
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Dear Fox: there is a difference between the jockey silks and the color of the number.
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Mike Tirico is Secretsriat.
Curt Menefee is Twice a Prince.
There is a 31 length difference between the two in hosting televised horse racing. #BelmontStakes
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Prat really trusted Nysos to back him out of the contested lead and then ask him to close down the stretch on a day when track bias said you had to have the early lead. Bold ride on a great horse.
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