12 Rules of Coaching Etiquette.... (long post)
As the season for coaches looking for different jobs is here, I felt compelled to share this list. I am sure I left some important things off, but here are some of the rules for coaching etiquette…
1. Keep the Boss in the loop
For Head Coaches, this is principal and for Asst. Coaches this is the Head Coach. The new place you are talking to is likely going to contact your boss (or someone else is going to tell them)… so you may as well be proactive and go ahead and have that conversation. It looks really bad when you do not. If you interview, you should let them know before the interview.
2. Never text or email big news.
If you need to change jobs, apply for jobs, or any other reason to have a serious conversation with a coach, ALWAYS either meet face to face or call. Do NOT text or email important news and information. I can’t stress this enough. Grow up and have tough conversations face-to-face. If you cannot make face-to-face, at least have the decency to call. There is no other way. Never email or text and important message. You ask players to be tough, you should have some toughness as well.
3. If you already got board approved, quit looking.
Every rule has an exception, but if you have been board approved, it is disrespectful to the place that worked hard to board approve you if you never coach at down there. If the school quit looking, you need to quit looking after an agreement is in place.
4. No one should get in the way of advancement when handled properly.
If a Head Coach is sabotaging assistant coaches’ chances for advancement, that is wrong. As long as the coach went through the proper channels to keep the Head Coach in the loop, the Head Coach should work to help that assistant improve their situation.
5. Don’t use your family as an excuse.
You should ALWAYS do what is best for your family, but do not use the blanket “best for my family” line to get out of something or to mask a situation you did not handle properly. While you should always actually do what is best for your family, have the tough conversations and keep the Head Coach in the loop. Do not use family as an excuse to do whatever it is you want to do. Do what’s best for your family but handle it properly.
6. Never bash the Boss.
Nothing good comes out of you being anything but loyal. Do not entertain or engage in anything that could create division. Loyalty is very important. The quickest way to develop a bad reputation as a coach is to be disloyal. You never know when your paths may cross again with everyone you are working with now. Keep your problems in house.
7. Assume they have your film.
The amount of covert work that goes on with producing bad film, promises not to trade, etc. is comical. With today’s technology, they can get your film somewhere else, and most people aren’t abiding by those “promises”. Just assume the other team has all your film and be a good guy and give them a decent video during the trade.
8. Communication works both ways.
If you are a Head Coach and interviewing coaches, respond to those that apply. If you interview someone, let them know if they did not get the job. “Ghosting” is for kids. Give the applying coach closure and, like everything else in communication, call is better than text.
9. Think like a marine.
You don’t have to be the first coach there or the last coach to leave, but you need to beat the players. Get to workouts/practice in plenty of time to help supervise, setup, etc. Don’t work to beat the players out of the door after practice. There is always something to do. Always ask the boss “do you need anything else from me?” before you leave. You do not have to work all night, but don’t be the last guy in and first out.
10. Figure out the money and responsibility before you commit.
Quit being scared to ask about your exact responsibilities and the pay early in the process and then later acting like you were misled. You are much less likely to be misled if you are proactive and talk about money and job responsibilities before you commit.
11. Start and end on time.
It is important to have respect for everyone’s schedule and a great way to show you respect their schedule is to begin and end everything on time. This shows you respect everyone’s lives outside of the sport.
12. Don’t make it weird.
If you do leave a job or interview for a job you don’t get… and see the guy somewhere else, do not make it weird. Go talk to them and show how much you appreciated your time there and respect the coach. Avoiding a coach because you felt like it ended poorly is a great way to continue to strain that relationship even further.