Things I Think
Joined February 2019
- Tweets 4,491
- Following 163
- Followers 234
- Likes 4,676
445 Photos and videos
May 24
explaining to bank manager that loaning me $50bn is a foolproof investment, as I plan to use it all on a put option against the banks stock
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May 17
as a White Sox fan, taking this quiz, first getting the cubs, then taking it again out of pure pique and admitted ignorance of Girls and Taylor Swift, only to get the fucking Astros, I have to say this somewhat makes sense
I have built a very scientific personality quiz to tell you what MLB team most closely aligns with your ~VIBE~
It is clearly Correct and Objective and you will almost certainly Like and Agree with the team that the quiz gives you. Thanks for playing!
tippingpitch.es/quiz
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Mar 18
Were onea bartender inclined to view most things as imbued with sinister portent, Americans drinking less in conjunction with bartending being one of the very few jobs irreplaceable by AI might qualify as being imbued with sinister portent
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Mar 13
It's been a while since I checked in with Ed and it's nice to know he's begun posting like Marjorie Taylor Green
Mar 13
Now the Burlington Progressive Party's inability to deal with the drug issues in Downtown #BTV is directly causing @CityMarketCoop to lay people off! Time to wake up! sevendaysvt.com/news/city-ma…
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Jan 22
If the bulls haven't won another championship by the time MJ dies they should entomb him at center court of the United center and disband the team
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Jan 10
It's time to take a strong stand against those using social media to promote procedurally generated, non consensual, SA adjacent material.
It's time to take a stand against BookTok.
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Jan 10
Great example of being right for the wrong reasons: people who were like "Social media? That's stupid, why would I want to look at pictures of people's lunch"
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Jan 10
Although it's only natural to loathe, despise, and suspect the bald man, one must also admit it is equally natural to envy the simplicity of his blessedly ignorant, though wicked, nature
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Jan 10
Hi user, this is a great idea -- unfortunately, I cannot confirm that sowing distrust between your immediate superiors and swooping in as the sole voice of reason is an effective workplace advancement strategy
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Jan 10
Giving a keynote speech on how Claude or Chatgpt could have peaceably resolved the Crisis of Mantuan Succession
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13 Dec 2025
[in a powdered wig and frock coat]
,,,, and that all mankinde, in itf plenitude of refourcef bothe phyfical & minde, fhoulde not thinke themfelvef ABOVE the moral obligation but CALLED to it, whenceupon a titty hathe fallened oute of a bloufe or petticoate,to remind itf owner,,
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13 Dec 2025
Disgusting, a grown man posting words on the Internet where people might see and read them. Have some self respect
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13 Dec 2025
Writing a 15,000 word Substack essay titled "Is Jouissance Liminal?"
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