COMEDIAN WHO WEARS SHORTS ON STAGE. PLANT-BASED GOD. NOT YOUR HOMIE. HOST OF @Interruptionsss. MY BUTT HAS A SEPARATE ACCOUNT @DaliaButt
Joined December 2010
- Tweets 48,358
- Following 418
- Followers 8,078
- Likes 82,224
3,498 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
20 Apr 2023
Now that my blue check is gone i can go back to freely posting ignorant tweets without being confused with someone who’d pay for twitter blue
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May 13
Gentlemen, let us settle our disagreement respectfully through the time-honored institution of sending our nation's teenagers to slaughter your nation's women and children
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May 10
Someone fraudulently named "dalia" is getting canceled on bluesky & i don't know the context but as the only true dalia i'm joining the side that doesn't besmirch the glorious name of dalia with falsehoods & transgressions
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Apr 10
It’s good to know that the people who used to reply to joke tweets with fact checks on here have found their people here at whatever this is
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Apr 10
If you want to know if 2 people who have the same first name are 2 different people, you can take a lil look at their last names & faces & if those aren’t the same you’ve got 2 people, let me know if you get stuck
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DALIA MALEK ☥ retweeted
18 Dec 2012
Oh the weather outside is frightful the fire inside is frightful the people inside are frightful the atmosphere inside is frightful the conv
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25 Dec 2025
I AM NOT A RAPPER & I NEVER WAS
21 Dec 2025
yeah are you still a rapper
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25 Dec 2025
I AM NOT A RAPPER & I WILL NOT BE DROPPING A MIXTAPE
20 Dec 2025
yeah still waiting on that mix tape to drop 🥺
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9 Aug 2025
This year i started finding cats kinda cute, is this what people mean by “biological clock”
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17 Aug 2024
May we learn from the bees & aspire to their elite level of revenge
ALT Bolsonaro Greenlights New Pesticides While Environmentalists Mourn 500 Million Dead Bees in Brazil
17 Aug 2024
Former Brazilian President Jair Bolsonaro was attacked by bees yesterday and had to abruptly end a speech he was making to a few hundred supporters.
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16 Jun 2025
Let the bees lead us to peace
ALT Billionaire friend of Prince of Wales dies after ‘swallowing a bee’
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20 Apr 2025
Saw a female comedian performing in a pants suit, HOWEVER DO YOU DO, MOST SOPHISTICATED FOREIGN SECRETARY OF DICK JOKE NATION, PLEASE REST YOUR LAPELS BETWEEN THE ANTIQUE STAINS IN THE GREEN ROOM TIL IT’S TIME TO DO A PORTION OF OR EVEN THE ENTIRETY OF 1 HOUR OF WORK FOR THE DAY
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14 Mar 2025
If joe biden was alive today he would praise the way the british prime minister makes the right wish they’d come up with his ideas
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8 Mar 2025
MARIO’S PICROSS IS ON SWITCH. IT FAILED IN NORTH AMERICA & STOPPED BEING DISTRIBUTED SO ITS SEQUELS INCLUDING MARIO’S SUPER PICROSS, ALSO ON SWITCH, WERE ONLY RELEASED IN JAPAN. FURIOUS I DIDN’T HAVE THESE AS A KID BUT WON’T LET MY BONES BEING DUST STOP ME FROM PICROSSING NOW
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2 Mar 2025
Was about to become a nazi but was incentivized not to after learning it could affect my financial performance
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1 Mar 2025
March 1st is international wheelchair day & March 1st rent is due so for international wheelchair day pay my rent, you grapes 🍇
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