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David Stratton @DavidStratton9

A loving tribute to Australia's finest film critic. Not the real David Stratton.

Joined March 2013
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51 Photos and videos
Just went to see Deepwater Horizon. Seeing all that oil spew into the ocean reminded me of the time Margaret had a red wine vom in my pool.
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You're always going to get those awkward questions from kids. "Grandpa, who is Robert DeNiro?" I paused. "He used to be an actor."
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Young people are always searching for the 'key to happiness'. Hot tip kids - the difference between these photos is literally 3 margaritas.
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Sorry I haven't been online in over a year, my BigPond was down. Luckily Telstra gave me priority service because I'm a celebrity.
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Stay tuned after the end credits of The Hateful Eight for a gratuitous, lingering close up of Uma Thurman's arse.
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Last tweet was a little harsh on Adam Sandler. I fucking love Billy Madison after a visit to my herb garden.
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American Indians' claim that Adam Sandler's new film is culturally insensitive brings the words culture and Sandler too close for my liking.
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You can tell Star Wars is set in the future because Han Solo has realised diamond earrings don't suit 70 year old men.
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It's this time of year I'm grateful for retirement, after the measly 16 weeks of paid annual leave I got at the ABC.
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At my age the force awakens 3-4 times a night.
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Adelaide claims title of hottest city on the planet today. Officials in Baghdad furious, but can still claim to have better night life.
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Following SES advice I've been bunkered down in my home cinema with a bottle of Grey Goose. Is the storm finished? Because this bottle is.
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Anyone else going to a midnight screening of The Dressmaker tonight?
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Disgusted at having paid almost double for Nurofen tablets that promised to directly target 'shakey-cam' pain.
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Friend texted me asking why I'd come back on Twitter. I replied with a selfie giving the thumbs up, with an empty bottle of Grey Goose.
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Highlight of ABC Xmas party was Barrie Cassidy slipping over in Mark Scott's vomit and screaming "Argh, my back!" Mark Scott just laughed.
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Quentin Tarantino's The Hateful 8 has been given a R18 rating. Or as Margaret says - "Finally, some slightly hard mainstream shit".
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The toddler/pensioner bookends of life share several similarities. The word 'involuntary' is definitely the saddest.
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Lots of people asking what I've been up to since At The Movies finished up. Train surfing, mostly.
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After avoiding my third potential confrontation of the day, I came to the sad realisation that I AM a man to be trifled with.
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