This dude really made a whole fantasy scenario up in his head just to glaze another mans wife lmao.
I am settling in for a showing of βMelaniaβ and the theater is PACKED!
Earlier, a bystander asked if I was heading in to see Avatar, and I stopped dead in my tracks.
βAvatar? No, son,β I curtly replied. βI donβt watch woke movies. Iβm here to see the groundbreaking documentary about our incredibly talented First Lady.β
The manβs two little girls began jumping up and down, pulling on his sleeve, and begging, βDaddy, we want to see Melania!β
βBut. Butβ¦β he stammered, βI thought you girls wanted to see Zootopia 2?β
βNo, no, NO,β they said, now nearly shouting. βWe want to see Melania!! She is the most beautiful First Lady EVER.β
Their father was scrambling, stressed out, and disoriented.
βGirls, Iβm afraid you arenβt the only ones who are captivated by President Trump and his beautiful wife,β I said, kneeling to get on their level. βVirtually everyone in this theater is here for the 7:30 PM showing, and itβs been sold out for days.β
Tears began to well up in their eyes.
βButβ¦β I said in a hushed tone, βI happen to have a few extra tickets with me, and Iβd like you and your dad to have them.β
They jumped for joy and began hugging their father. He looked relieved as he wiped the sweat off his brow with a smile.
I handed him the tickets and pulled him close. βRaise these girls right,β I whispered. βTeach them to be classy conservative women of faith like Melania, donβt let them become like Meghan Markle. Capisce?β
He hugged me and thanked me profusely. βWhat are you going to do now?β He asked.
βDonβt worry about me, son,β I told him, with a twinkle in my eye. βIβve already got tickets to the next showing.β