Slightly dopey bloke who's had too many donuts on his route through life and likes acting. Made a funny once (2004) favstar.fm/users/Floatersfin…
Joined June 2011
- Tweets 75,265
- Following 3,910
- Followers 3,561
- Likes 17,932
1,469 Photos and videos
Stubaby retweeted
12 Dec 2022
We are in the process of drafting a new law to ensure that perfume/fragrance ads cannot be shown on television. Ever!
If you are also in favour of this law, please show some support
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12 Oct 2021
I got attacked by a pheasant on my walk last night. I’m not sure where that leaves me on the food chain. I’m not sure about anything any more to be honest
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Stubaby retweeted
23 Sep 2021
Actually working ‘out out’. Enjoying being face to face again and hearing @cesarcernuda and his UK leadership team at #NetAppPartnerAcademy
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12 Aug 2021
If you want to know how bad global warming is just ask yourself what all the billionaires are doing.
That’s right, building escape ships.
Makes you think huh?
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8 Jun 2021
We have recommended tweets I see. One was “I love the way you cum”. Unless she likes a bloke looking like Goofy and sounding like a knackered steam train at the moment of release, I doubt she was talking about me.
8 Jun 2021
I’m back on the trains. Which means I have to listen to lots of stupid people. I’m already thinking maybe another lockdown wouldn’t be too bad.
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27 Jun 2019
Just downloaded dozens of MP3s from YouTube! Free & safe, try it freemake.com/free_youtube_co… via @Freemakecom
5 Mar 2019
I’m all in favour of freedom of expression. But why is it that when I’m on a nude beach the person who always sits closest to me is always a 50 year old German with a cock like an angry Rottweilers chew toy?
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5 Mar 2019
So I get buggered on the tube, knifed 15 times walking round London then some bastard tries to blow me up at Waterloo
Welcome to London
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26 Sep 2018
Me: it’s complicated ... she has issues
Friend: what issues?
Me: well, not to put too fine a point on it, she’s a woman for a start
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6 Sep 2018
I’m on a train carriage and there are lots of mothers with young babies
Gosh almighty doesn’t that screaming make me wish I’d had children or what?
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29 Aug 2018
That moment you get off the train, look around with a happy smile, then remember you don’t live here any bloody more ...
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29 Aug 2018
I have also bought a house. I think I am having an end of mid life crisis. If I buy a Citroen people carrier please shoot me
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29 Aug 2018
Decided to go on a camping holiday as I haven’t been for ages
Now remember why I haven’t been on a camping holiday for ages
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10 Jul 2018
Seriously I’m very pleased that those Thai lads have been saved, but teaching another generation of footballers how to dive seems madness
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7 Jul 2018
You can tell how hot it is in the UK cos even the cyclists and joggers have stopped looking smug
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21 Mar 2018
Got one of those new train tickets you download to your phone. Now I’m in trouble as I got my phone stuck in the ticker reader. I’m at that age now you see
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