Professional investor, amateur comedian
Joined January 2011
- Tweets 1,516
- Following 694
- Followers 2,946
- Likes 55,892
166 Photos and videos
Jun 15
SPCX has added $680b in market cap since everyone on here told me it was overvalued.
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May 21
It turns out I was holding it upside down. Please disregard my prior tweet.
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HeyMan800 retweeted
May 14
“He’s about to have a mental breakdown about finances. Have his wife send him a Zillow listing.”
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May 8
False alarm.
This was just me getting out of my car.
May 8
BREAKING NEWS: FBI files reveal reports of 'four-foot tall' beings emerging from UFOs
Community note
The referenced FBI memo describing reports of "four-foot tall" beings is from October 1966 and has been publicly available via FOIA for years. vault.fbi.gov/UFO theblackvault.com/documentarchiv…
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Sued by Patel and after news broke that the FBI is investigating her piece, she just drops this. Love it
EXCLUSIVE: My latest story for @TheAtlantic: theatlantic.com/politics/202…
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May 5
I’m a single issue voter and that issue is whoever gets a school named after Spirit Airlines.
May 4
I’m calling on the Florida State Government to buy the Spirit Airlines Headquarters to turn it into a public high school and name it after Spirit and their employees.
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Apr 24
Ok so the good news is the US now has a sovereign wealth fund.
The bad news is its current allocation is 100% into Spirit Airlines.
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HeyMan800 retweeted
Apr 4
I think that publicly posting this employee’s name and detailed history in the midst of litigation for wrongful termination is a really smart move. Your lawyers probably telling you the opposite but IGNORE THEM, you really have the best instincts ❤️❤️
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Mar 29
Would be neat for us to have a foreign policy that didn’t cause us to have existential dread as we waited for Sunday futures to start trading at the end of every weekend.
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Mar 27
Iran has not yet responded to my idea of dropping all their energy infrastructure into an MLP to take advantage of the tax benefits.
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Mar 20
Big shout out to the activists at Elliott Management that convinced Southwest Airlines management to stop hedging fuel costs.
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Mar 18
So it turns out being an investor in defense companies does not mean I get to board the plane early when they invite on active military personnel.
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Mar 18
This is also how women at the beach describe my physical appearance.
Mar 18
GABBARD SAYS IRAN REGIME IS INTACT BUT LARGELY DEGRADED
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Mar 14
Based on my expert analysis after reviewing the latest developments, it appears that Kharg Island was a poor choice for my kid’s spring break.
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Mar 9
Tomorrow is going to be one of the worst days for Trump since he lost his close personal friend Jeffrey Epstein.
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Mar 2
Just stood on my desk and yelled OIL TO $100.
Was told that I’ve been warned I’m not allowed to stand on my desk.
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Feb 24
I’d like to see AI have a panic attack at its desk half as good as I can.
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Feb 23
Apparently the market collapse today was due to someone else’s blog post, not my blog post ranking all of the Twilight movies.
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