I think one mistake a lot of men make is seeing marriage as a form of compensation, while some women also see marriage as a reward for everything they have done during the relationship.
I know a guy whose girlfriend stood by him when he was struggling.
She would cook for him, spend her own money on him sometimes, support him financially, and generally be there for him.
However, almost everyone around him warned him not to marry her because they noticed something he kept overlooking.
She was very disrespectful.
Not just to other people, but to him as well.
When his friends kept asking why he still wanted to marry her, one statement he made has always stayed with me:
“After everything she has done for me, how can I leave her?”
Eventually, they got married.
Today, that marriage is a mess.
The guy hardly has peace in his own home. According to him, there is an argument almost every day. Sometimes he stays away from the house for days because he cannot cope with the constant conflict.
Immediately after the wedding, the woman stopped working and became a full-time housewife. Everything she used to do while they were dating stopped, and the financial responsibility fell entirely on him, even though he only owns a barbing shop.
The sad part is that neither of them seems happy.
This is why I believe marriage should never be used as compensation.
You do not marry someone simply because they sacrificed for you or supported you during difficult times.
You marry because you have assessed their character, your compatibility, your values, and you genuinely believe you can build a peaceful life together.
Gratitude is important.
But gratitude alone is not a good enough reason to marry someone.
If you marry out of guilt or obligation instead of compatibility, you may spend years paying for a decision that should never have been made.