I write horrific and comedic Urban Fantasy. I'm devilishly handsome, completley insecure and prefer drinks with umbrellas in them.

Joined September 2015
23 Photos and videos
28 Jun 2018
#SFFpit Toby is a 20-year-old nobody handicapped by a tragic childhood. He's not sure his only friend even exists, and the supernatural misfits who just saved his life need therapy. Sure, Armageddon is motion, but he's just focused on becoming a part of their dysfunctional family
28 Jun 2018
#SFFpit Toby is a 20 yr. old nobody handicapped by a tragic childhood. He's not sure his only friend even exists, and the supernatural misfits who just saved his life need therapy. Sure, Armegeddon is at hand, but he's just focused on becoming a part of their dysfunctional family
28 Jun 2018
#SFFpit The Dandies of the Underworld have a few issues. An ancient evil wants a twenty-year-old has-been dead. A televangelist is arming his followers. The Devil wants to recover the soul of a genocidal dictator but most importantly - who's going to call their therapist back?
28 Jun 2018
#SFFpit #UF Toby spent his childhood being raised as a dog by his twisted mother. Now at 20 he is desperately trying to use his fading viral celebrity for cash. But when he's attacked at Comic-Con he will be swept up by a group of Supernatural Misfits rambling about Armageddon.
28 Jun 2018
#SFFpit #UF #NA BITE ME×THE STAND His viral video celebrity has faded. He's totally failing at ignoring his talking plush toy and the group of ragtag Supernatural Misfits who just saved him from being killed by an ancient evil at Comic-Con keep talking about Armageddon.
28 Jun 2018
#SFFpit #UF #LGBT His social media celebrity has faded. He is epically failing at ignoring his talking plush toy and the group of ragtag Supernatural Misfits who just saved him from being killed by a hulking creature at Comic-Con keep rambling about Armageddon.
28 Jun 2018
#SFFpit #UF Toby is 20 Yr. Old viral video celebrity whose trying to make ends meat when he's swept up with a group supernatural misfits. Together they will try to answer why an ancient evil wants Toby dead, why a televangelist is raising an army and try to stop Armageddon.
28 Jun 2018
#sffpit #uf Toby is a former social media star trying to ignore his talking piggy plush toy. The Dandies of the Underworld are a team of mystical misfits trying to figure out why an ancient evil wants Toby dead, why a pyscho TV preacher is ranting and where did Hitler's soul go.
JP Dildine retweeted
We'll be here March 8th as a part of the Red Gorilla Music Festival! We play at 5 - come say hello and see some great music! #redgorilla #atxmusic
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17 Nov 2017
Jesus Christ I feel like I just ate Sally Struthers
29 Oct 2017
My Saturday night... love all my girls!!!
29 Oct 2017
My Saturday night... love all my girls!!! instagram.com/p/Ba0BwYkj8UQ/

21 Aug 2017
Kids are back in school! Finally I can get back to day drinking.
20 Aug 2017
Wife was trying to explain to our youngest the incident in Charlottesville and intentionally quoted Yoda. So much love for her.
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31 Oct 2016
Halloween – The Best Damn Holiday in America (Suck it Christmas) shitishouldntsayblog.wordpre…
26 Oct 2016
5 Reasons Democrats Should Vote Trump – I’m Serious shitishouldntsayblog.wordpre…
17 Mar 2016
Dildine & Scruggs Emails – Star Wars And H-Town shitishouldntsayblog.wordpre…
10 Mar 2016
Ask Uncle Scruggs – Office Lovin shitishouldntsayblog.wordpre…
Ted Cruz – The Monster At The Gate shitishouldntsayblog.wordpre…