We’re all just killing time and having fun
Joined September 2011
- Tweets 74,779
- Following 652
- Followers 65,649
- Likes 155,624
9,451 Photos and videos
My girlfriend asked if I’m “making my dog food” again tonight
OBVIOUSLY YES
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It’s 2003 and she says “brb” then comes back 47 minutes later and apologizes so sincerely you decide she’s the one
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Controversial opinion: a great relationship is more important than satisfying sex
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Jun 12
It used to be better
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Jun 12
Why should any guy wait to have sex with her when she had sex with a bunch of strangers?
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Jun 12
With the limitless choice offered to her through dating apps, her standards for what she’s attracted to have skyrocketed.
These guys don’t get it.
If she’s not attracted to you now, she never will be. You have one shot to get it right.
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Jun 12
Women fantasize about luxury, men fantasize about self sacrifice
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Jun 12
Meaty nipples
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Jun 11
But why do people say Taylor Swift is annoyi-
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Jun 12
Skip from Bleeding Me directly to Outlaw Torn and this album is a total banger
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Jun 12
HE DID NOT MEAN IT IN A BAD WAY
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Jun 11
Her screen name was “LostGirlxoxo” and all she said was “nm u?” but somehow you knew she was hot. You just knew.
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Jun 11
It’s 2007 and the cute girl from OkCupid finally gets a camera phone
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Jun 11
Getting older is realizing pancakes are for children and corned beef hash is for men who have seen things.
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Jun 11
Britney has this crazy X factor where she isn’t conventionally pretty at all but somehow has red hot sex appeal
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