Orthopedic surgeon. Lover of puns and medical humor. And osteosynthesis. Nothing here should be taken as actual medical advice.

Joined November 2019
3,306 Photos and videos
#orthotwitter #medtwitter Well, sir, it’s been years since your total shoulder & everything seems like it’s going very well. You have no pain, & great strength & range of motion. X-rays are stable, & there’s no signs of infection. The Bacterium Formerly Known As P. acnes:
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Not sure how much I’ll use it, but I had to create a new 🟦sky account (efforts at anonymity = I forgot my password & didn’t have a backup) I’ll now be there as lady-interlocks. Will try to find as many of you as possible there too.
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Watching election coverage right now feels like refreshing the EMR to see if the labs you literally just sent are back. Like, yeah, I knew the Hb was going to be 8, but what’s the white count? Is the INR going to be 1.5 or 15?

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Well obviously he’s hitting it out of the park. That’s just some kid who says “Shazam!” right before he goes up to the plate

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FREDDIE FREEMAN CAN'T STOP! #WORLDSERIES
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Some kids have BFFs. Some kids have BBFFs. Some kids have both (or at least they do according to the peds patient who said I was their “BFF” while waking up from sedation for a fracture reduction)
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“That patient has bedbugs”
Do it!!!
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Diagnosis: infected nonunion with failure of fixation. Treatment: resection of nonviable tissue with deep implant removal, interpositional allograft, and revision fixation.
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In my n of 1, empiric interventional analysis has demonstrated that a Reese’s cup prior to 10am can positively affect mood. However, to achieve sufficient power, additional study is necessary.

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Do you ever watch a trailer for a direct-to-streaming movie & think, “wow that could be really good” but know deep down that you’ll never actually watch it bc there’s a reason it’s on Netflix & not in theaters? That’s what it feels like going on dating apps in your 30s
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Like, it’s a good concept but not *great* Maybe there’s a plot hole. Or the ending is disappointing. Or the dialogue is just…off. But you just know you’d end up wasting 2 hours on a Saturday afternoon thinking, I guess it might’ve worked with different casting?
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“ What are you going to be for Halloween?” An introvert, Susan. I’m going to be an introvert.

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Whenever I get frustrated about the inverse correlation between results & relative amount of time/effort I put into my fantasy fb team, I remember trying to learn EKGs & it all makes sense. Well, not EKGs. Those still don’t make sense.
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I ain’t having no MID-life crisis. All my life crises gonna be EXTRA.
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They also tend to be EXistential and EXhausting, which has an appealing aspect of alliteration.
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Probably a Category 6 abyss, with which all HCWs are familiar
I'm going to go scream into the abyss now...
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Screaming into a… - Category 1 abyss: having to change your EMR password. Again. - Category 2 abyss: your patient ate breakfast, surgery delayed x8hrs - Category 3 abyss: they added another click before you can sign each clinic note
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- Category 4 abyss: whatever your specialty’s version of “tibula” is - Category 5 abyss: prior auth/peer to peer - Category 6 abyss: explaining objective facts to the confidently-wrong
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Seems about as legit as a potassium of 6 in a hemolyzed specimen
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🎶 I’m working late, cuz I’m a surgeon I look so cute, here with my add-on 🎶
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Breaking news out of the Shire!
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{overheard in the OR} RN, to general surgeon: “I’m not an a$$hole. I’m hemorrhoid—I’m here to irritate a$$holes”
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