~Life's a joke so just laugh ~ Freelance word manipulator ~ Don't let facts get in the way of a good joke ~ RIP Guvfather x Northern Soul will never die✊ KTF
Joined May 2013
- Tweets 22,434
- Following 930
- Followers 18,248
- Likes 26,066
2,187 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
10 Sep 2022
She looks like she's nodding one back to the keeper
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If I've taken anything away from the leaked sex tape it's that P-Diddy is fucking terrible with a camcorder.
Jeremy Beadle will be turning in his grave...
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May 23
Hull v Middlesbrough in the Playoffs Final.
Or the El ClaSUEco as it will be remembered...
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May 21
**BREAKING **
Jay Cartwright expected to be left out of Thomas Tuchel's England World Cup squad. Jay stated "FIFA said it wouldn't be fair on the other teams as I'm basically better than Maradona, Pele and Darren Anderton put together"
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May 21
It's almost as if a German wouldn't want England to win the World Cup...
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May 20
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May 19
Southampton's ticket office staff after issuing over 30,000 Play-Off Final refunds tomorrow.
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May 19
Delboy to Rodney before heading over to Amsterdam to collect diamonds for Boycie and Abdal.
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May 19
Southampton FC expelled from the Championship Play-off final due to spying on opponents training.
They obviously didn't see this coming...
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May 18
I've started using Mounjaro.
Not to lose weight but to keep my shopping bill low...
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May 13
Absolutely Susan perb news, best sitcom in many years.👌
Two Doors Down Series 8 confirmed:
comedy.co.uk/tv/news/8739/tw…
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Wow that was some fight, respect to both fighters who both left it all in the ring🥊
#WardleyDubois
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That's constable Kevin Goody from The Thin Blue Line.
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Apr 27
Very poor decision from the @FA based on this statement. Gutted for all the players, staff and supporters.
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Apr 27
Going through the big book of exotic baby names knowing you'll play safe and go for Steven.
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Apr 27
In the 80s you'd get a back-hander...
Apr 27
I told my daughter to go to bed. She did not therefore, she missed out on her sleep over. She cried. But what she did not know is I cried harder. I hate when she cries. 💔 Discipline sucks. But sometimes it’s important.
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Apr 26
That London Marathon time is nothing.
I can do a days work of 7.24 hours in under 2 hours, and with a dinner break included...
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Apr 26
Like he's gone paintballing after finishing a shift in CeX.
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Tears of a Clown retweeted
Apr 26
David Brent walking back into the room after Googling facts about Dostoevsky.
Apr 26
Wait! @piersmorgan I’ve found that verse!!
The really important thing is that we, you, me all of us are loved.
And not because of anything we have accomplished or ever could achieve.
But because of who loves us.
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Apr 26
Me in 1990 going through the Argos catalogue deciding what I wanted for Christmas.
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