she/her. funnier online. fatter in person. potty mouthed do-gooder. pied piper of chaos. irrepressible. bird whisperer. magic maker. story teller. HVAC queen.
Joined March 2009
- Tweets 129,270
- Following 3,225
- Followers 6,089
- Likes 48,621
11,856 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
30 May 2025
It’s the same photo.
Had a special celebrity visit at the feeder, @TheSimpsons very own Mr. Burns!
Little known fact, Mr. Burns may go by Montgomery but his real name is Chipmunkgomery Burns. 👀
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Jun 5
I would rather gargle @DonaldTrump’s bath water than deal with the incompetence of @ups
I would rather dine on a plate of @PierrePoilievre toenail clippings than interact with the customer service* at @UPS
* oxy-fucking-moron
Jun 5
I’d rather carve my own eyeballs out with a 1980s @McDonalds coffee/cocaine spoon than spend another second talking to @UPS
I’d rather trap live rats under a glass lid on my bare belly, then heat the glass so the rats furiously burrow into my flesh to escape than deal with @UPS
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Jun 5
I’d rather carve my own eyeballs out with a 1980s @McDonalds coffee/cocaine spoon than spend another second talking to @UPS
I’d rather trap live rats under a glass lid on my bare belly, then heat the glass so the rats furiously burrow into my flesh to escape than deal with @UPS
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May 30
Jfc, what is it with American anthem singers that feel the need to make their mark while singing said anthem?
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Apr 17
Witnessing Trump have an epic global hissy fit and public temper tantrum every time someone dared disagree with or push back against him, including but certainly not limited to the Catholic fucking pope; has really gotta make you wonder how he’d react to a woman telling him no.
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Apr 5
I’ve been yelling about @DanhausenAd since like…pre-covid times.
I am so stoked about the reaction he’s getting now on @WWE
Some of us have known for years what the rest of y’all are just discovering. #YouAreCursed #VeryNice #VeryEvil Shoulda taken the tag @mikethemiz 👀 🦇 🦷
19 Oct 2025
Holy shit-hausen, look who I found!
Very nice, very evil: even if he doesn’t know how to use a thermostat 🤷🏼♀️ @DanhausenAD
What an absolute icon . 🖤
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Mar 27
I guess that’s one way to de-value the USD.
Mar 26
U.S. President Donald J. Trump’s Treasury Department is planning to add his signature to all denominations of the United States Dollar moving forward, which will mark the first time in history that the sitting president’s signature will appear on American Currency, with Trump’s signature expected to replace that of the U.S. Treasurer, Brandon Beach, sitting alongside his Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent’s, several sources including Beach himself have confirmed to Vanity Fair.
Community note
Proposal relates to signature only. No proposal to add Trump's portrait. Picture with the post is misleading as it suggests Trump is proposing to replace Benjamin Franklyn's portrait on the $100 bill.
usnews.com/news/politics/…
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Mar 27
Considering Trump appointed 3/9 Supreme Court justices, this clip is extra tasty
Mar 26
BREAKING: President Donald Trump just praised Nick Shirley for exposing massive fraud and corruption in the United States
Nick Shirley now has his eyes set on Canada 🇨🇦
The liberals must be shaking in their pants right now
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Mar 26
And while I’m kvetching about politics, let me remind all elected officials your job is to represent your constituents; sometimes you’re going to be put in uncomfortable situations within your own party, but your loyalty is to your constituents and it’s your JOB to speak up.
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Mar 26
1) As someone who lives in the Transcona ward, I’d like some answers, primarily if he’s going to step away; if he’s only communicating through a lawyer he’s already hindering my ability to reach my councillor.
-cont #wpgpoli #Wyatt #RussWyatt
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Mar 26
6) If he was already faltering without a trial over his head, why do we think he can continue effectively working behind a lawyer? Keep the pressure on until he capitulates and does the right damn thing. #wpgpoli #RussWyatt -cont
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Mar 26
7) and may this be a hard lesson to #Transcona and beyond; and giving pause when voting out of habit and familiarity instead of vision, alignment and ability and stability. He never should have won in 2022.
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