@NickLarson85 profile picture
Nick Larson @NickLarson85
Joined December 2011
  • Tweets 1,069
  • Following 256
  • Followers 339
241 Photos and videos
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Nick Larson@NickLarson85
3 Jun 2020
Big Ed, from @90DayFiance looks like all the Impractical Jokers guys smashed together. @truTVjokers
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Nick Larson retweeted
Punch Line Sacramento@PunchLineSac
25 Mar 2024
Album: recents Thank you all for the laughs ✨ Check out what we’ve got going on this week ⬇️ 🎀 Open Mic hosted by @MarcusMangham // Wed 🎀 @SirLanceWoods // Wed 🎀 @PhilMhanley // Thu-Sat πŸ“Έ: @NickLarson85
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Nick Larson retweeted
Punch Line Sacramento@PunchLineSac
18 Mar 2024
Highlights from Jordan Jensen’s shows ✨ Check out what what we’ve got coming up this week πŸ‘‡ 🎀 David Nihill: 3/19 & 3/20 🎀 Dressed to Kill: 3/20 🎀 Moses Storm: 3/21-23 🎀 Comedy Allstars: 3/22 🎀 Roast Battle Bay Area: 3/24 🎀 @tmurph: 3/24 πŸ“Έ by @NickLarson85
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I consider myself a seasoned comic because the longer I do this the saltier I get
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Friends would've been even more popular if they changed the show's name to Rachel's Nipples
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Not everyone who wears a band-aid is crazy, but every crazy person is wearing a band-aid.
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To be fair #KattWilliams never said what kind of books he was reading to get to 3,000
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My step-dad passed away when I was 16, and I've never met my biological father. If I had a 90s alternative band, it would be called Two Dads Down.
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The worst part of working out is how you turn into a gawdamn fart factory. I'm up 200%. If my intestines were stocks, I'd be rich... Rich with farts.
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My new favorite thing: Watching ex cholos continue their prison workout routine at an actual gym. Fast paced with zero proper form πŸ’ͺ😎
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You bought your 1 year old a rifle for his birthday? MFer that's for YOU! Just be honest, ya weirdo. Now, excuse me while I go gift wrap my baby's Playstation 5...
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When my tall friends come in for a hug, I don't stand on my toes, I let them come down to my level... Actually, I get even lower. Try it next time, my fellow short kings. It's such a power move
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New study links nose picking to increased risk of Dementia. Unrelated question: Does anyone know how to stop picking their nose? Asking for a friend...
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Asshole drivers be like, "Ooh, you got half a car length between you and the car ahead of you? Let me get up in there real quick..."
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I wish I had HALF the confidence of this guy that just walked into the gym with a cherry blossom print shirt, pink shorts and yellow crocs.
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"Let's take an episode of My 600lbs Life and make it even more sad and depressing than it already is. It'll be called The Whale."
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Roseanne's set, on Fox, was like watching a new comic trying to be "edgy." The only funny part was her ridiculous Dukes of Hazard outfit.
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They figured out how to put a Tupac hologram on stage but they still can't figure out how to keep a Bluetooth headset from cutting off when I go into another room.. TECHNOLOGY
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This whole time I thought @paulscheer was playing the character Andrew Tate πŸ€¦β€β™‚οΈ
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F#Β’k your matching pajama family pictures. Merry Christmas you filthy animals πŸ–€πŸŽ„β„οΈ
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Me: "Whoa. Gas is under $4 again!" Old person: "Hoowee.. I remember when gas was just what came out of the horse, when I was on my buggy!"
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