Before I was pensions dave I was in a band. Best days ever (sorry pensions world). Here’s our band camp page if you would ever like to have a nose (ear... you know what I mean). bookharrison.bandcamp.com

Kevin Maguire: "After the attack on the Liverpool football parade & it was a white guy, middle class, former royal marine, no-one went after other white, middle class former marines & set this person represents that entire group"

On comms yesterday, @Cricket_Mann was talking about the ageing process... Wait for the @philtufnell punchline at the end 😂

Erm, I think we know a ceiling toaster when we see one, thanks very much.

Everyone COPY this video, share it far and wide. Paramount Skydance billionaire baby David Ellison can’t handle that Stephen Colbert is getting millions of views . @Youtube we will cancel our subscription as we did when we dumped @paramountplus.

The great Paul Whitehouse is 68 years old today, which means I am obliged to post this (again!) - arguably the most majestically random but brilliant comedy sketch committed to celluloid for at least the last, what, forty, forty five years? Yes, forty, forty five years. Happy birthday Paul 🤘

On behalf of their client, Zara Sultana, Bindmans Media and Information Law Practise Group requires that I publish the following statement on X, and that such statement must be clearly visible and pinned to my profile for a continuous period of no less than 24 hours: “On 30 March 2026, I published a post on my X account addressed to Zarah Sultana in which I stated that she encourages and incites violence and is friends with terrorists. Those statements are false. I was wrong and offer my sincere apologies to Ms Sultana for the harm and distress caused to her.” It is my very great pleasure to do this, and I reiterate my sincere and repeated offer to meet with Miss Zara Sultana in person to resolve our differences.

What we crave is an old-school government so boring no-one knows their names. Competent, professional. But we're led by a story-hungry media desperate for new drama for sponsored podcasts. If they had their way we'd have a new PM every month, each worse than the last.

“The country is becoming ungovernable...” The Times's Matthew Syed says constant leadership speculation is making it harder for Prime Ministers to make tough choices. #Newsnight

Ed balls all over X on Ed Balls day! Too much.

Beautiful. More please.

I’ve been casually slipping in fake British sayings and words into conversation with my American partner - here’s the one’s she believes:

Turns out i AM a professional footballer after all, exciting times.

Over on LI I've done an article on why the State Pension will be around forever (pay attention young people, stop saying it will go). But it is likely to change. linkedin.com/pulse/why-state…

Is the state pension really so 'meagre'? Let's take a look... The basic state pension is just £12,547 a year. But... Only around 15% of pensioners rely on the state pension alone. The vast majority have other income from private pensions etc., which is exactly how our system is designed to work (and why the UK has generous tax breaks for pension contributions). The small proportion of pensioners whose only source of income is the state pension are entitled to other benefits in addition, including pension credit, housing benefit and council tax support. A pensioner with no other income, no savings, no disabilities, no care responsibilities and rent of £800 per month is entitled to £401.55 a week in benefits including state pension, which is £20,881 a year. For comparison, a full time minimum wage worker has an after tax income of £21,364. Unlike a pensioner, a full time minimum wage worker is not entitled to free travel, free prescriptions, a winter fuel payment or senior citizens discounts. £21,000 a year is not a lot of money. But the very poorest pensioners have similar incomes to low-wage workers. Given the greater costs faced by those who are working, it's perhaps not surprising that working age adults are now more likely to live in poverty than pensioners. And at the other end of the scale, one in four pensioners are millionaires and still receive the basic state pension, paid for by current tax payers (including those on minimum wage). No one (definitely not me) is suggesting that the state pension should be reduced for the poorest pensioners. But pension spending now accounts for half of the UK's social security budget and, given the urgent need to cut government spending, we must consider reforms like means-testing and scrapping the triple lock.

Right triple lock, Iran etc can we all just stop for a minute. Looks like Boards of Canada are back. Chill out. @boardsofcanada

Been a mad weekend on here: - Earth is flat fake photos! 🙄 - triple lock is untouchable 🙄 - trump’s outbursts as he drags the world into a mess 🙄 What a world.