Gimme back that Filet-O-Fish, gimme that fish!
Joined September 2017
- Tweets 5,809
- Following 67
- Followers 77
- Likes 15,733
1,786 Photos and videos
Did I unknowingly venture into an alternate reality where the concept of humor doesn't exist? The sarcasm couldn't have been more obvious if OP had curled into a ball in the rain holding a sign that read, "This is obviously a joke."
Feb 25
Notice he doesn’t have Tourette’s when he Tweets
Community note
That's not how Tourette's Syndrome works.
ninds.nih.gov/health-informa…
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18 Dec 2025
There's that operatic growl once again. I love him beyond reason. I would slay every billionaire, bury them in a mass grave and dance upon it if that is what his safety required.
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16 Dec 2025
People who break things when they are angry are stupid and feeble. I would never try to fight inanimate objects because they can't fight back. I would much rather fight a baby. Babies can fight back to a certain extent and that's good enough for me.
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14 Dec 2025
What a fine aristocratic emissary of the ocean. He slithers effortlessly across the ground, utterly unconcerned with how he's perceived, and marks his sudden gracious halt with an operatic growl akin to a herald's call.
14 Dec 2025
dude how does he manage to stop himself so flawlessly like that he doesn’t keep slipping forward at all
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14 Dec 2025
Despite being blinded by punch-drunk love, the human mind hardly notices that it's stuck fighting one battle after another. It clings to a master, any master, if it promises direction. It comforts itself with licorice and pizza knowing eventually there will be blood.
14 Dec 2025
The inherent vice of the human mind to boogie for nights without intermission is anything but perfunctory. It is a hard eight compulsion rather than a casual indulgence, stitched together by a phantom thread. Like a magnolia tree, it spreads without really knowing when to stop.
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14 Dec 2025
The inherent vice of the human mind to boogie for nights without intermission is anything but perfunctory. It is a hard eight compulsion rather than a casual indulgence, stitched together by a phantom thread. Like a magnolia tree, it spreads without really knowing when to stop.
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12 Dec 2025
I admire the politeness and cordiality Pablo Torre maintains even in tweets where he's about to reveal something embarrassing. "Hi James, earlier you threatened to sue me for defamation, but I've since found footage of you having sex with your assistant coach. Thanks, Pablo."
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12 Dec 2025
It appears that I share a braincell with many others for I too find this reminiscent of Saddam Hussein.
12 Dec 2025
Brie is such an annoying cheese, what am I supposed to do with all this crust
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12 Dec 2025
People who insist on announcing their love for music are nothing short of pretentious. "I love music." Yeah, we know, you've said it 8000 times. True music lovers dance to their favourite music alone in unguarded solitude while draped in nothing but a birthday suit.
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12 Dec 2025
I carry a baseball at all times just in case I encounter someone who uses an apostrophe to pluralize. I cannot allow anyone to indulge in such unholy practices.
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12 Dec 2025
Learning French so that when I lure all the French girls into my backyard with strategically placed baguettes, I can further entice them with my impeccable grasp of the French language.
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12 Dec 2025
Ah yes, how shocking. The platform awash in pornography would rather keep me hooked on tiny dopamine jolts. Very well. I'll log my progress in the confines of my mind, if I must.
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12 Dec 2025
Breaking character and just being the endearingly awkward fool I am so I don't scare off the goth girls.
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11 Dec 2025
I opened the internet movie database, and it shook me to my core to discover that One Battle After Another had fallen below its sacred 8 rating. And lo, those who committed this act of sacrilege shall answer for it in due time.
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11 Dec 2025
"Hey, what's up?"
Me, thinking about the time Jamie Lee Curtis posted a picture of Palestinian children thinking they were Israeli and then deleted it: The Lakers, man. They lost. I'm sad.
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11 Dec 2025
Devising an elaborate plan to lobotomize everyone who incorrectly uses POV.
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11 Dec 2025
No, you do not. The genre of internet philosophy has always struck me as unintentionally comical. Presenting everyday thoughts as if they were revelations is almost an insult to the reader. If it's not one thing it's another. Does anyone find that to be true?
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11 Dec 2025
Going to space is nothing short of cowardice. You just want to trade your earthly responsibilities for an escape into the cosmic nothingness of an endless void. #fakedemon
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