If you’re wondering what happened to me... I’m now exclusively on Substack. I apologize for not letting you know sooner. Given Substack's 7x subscriber growth, the choice was easy. If you’d like to stay connected, you can find me here: newsletter.ryandelaney.co/

Interested in being an online Creator? Check out The Creator Retreat 🌳 It’s perfect for people who want to write, teach, or coach online and are looking for: • Practical tools • Personalized support • Like-minded community • Guidance Learn more: thecreatorretreat.substack.c…

I’m not lazy. I’m just scared.

It's time to stop labeling women and men as psychologically disordered and start relating to them for who they are: Real human beings with real feelings who suffered trauma/conditioning/domestication and want to return to wholeness with the help of others' love and compassion.

Yes, allow yourself to feel the emotions. Don’t try to suppress them. When you suppress, you resist. But allowing yourself to feel them without judgment, you allow them to pass through.

I've been quiet here because I’m launching The Creator Retreat: a space for online Creators to find community, share authentically, and make a living doing what they love (and loving what they do). Ready to level up your creative path? Learn more: thecreatorretreat.substack.c…

I used to think relationship conflict meant something was wrong. Eventually, I realized some conflict was to be expected. Conflict indicates a willingness to have difficult conversations. A relationship without conflict implies we're either enlightened or dead.

I wanted to be a “good” person when I was younger. I thought being good meant always being kind, always giving, always putting others first, and never being selfish. So, I gave and gave and gave. But eventually, my tank ran empty. I became exhausted, burned out, and resentful. I thought, “Why do people keep taking? Don’t they see how much I’ve given? Why don’t people give back as much as I give?” Back then, I still believed in “kill them with kindness.” If I kept giving, people would understand and meet me halfway. But here’s what I learned: People don’t know your limits unless you set them. I wasn’t giving from my heart—but from a place of obligation, fear of others’ wrath, and a desperate need to feel “good.” And when you give like that, it’s not kindness. It’s self-neglect and manipulation. Eventually, I realized something that changed my life: I am responsible for my boundaries. I had to stop blaming others for taking and ask myself, “Why do I keep giving so much?” Now, I give because I want to—not because I feel I have to. I also regularly say " no.” And if someone shows me they’re insincere, unwilling to meet in the middle, or only there to take, I let them go. I no longer believe in “good” or “bad.” Instead, I believe in being sincere, avoiding unwholesome contact with others and being honest with yourself first and foremost. When kindness comes from a whole heart and clear boundaries, it is not only more satisfying for you but also more satisfying for everyone.

You don't have to fall madly in love with yourself, but I boldly invite you to stop: •Saying "I should" and "I have to" •Comparing yourself to others •Chasing perfection And start: •Trusting yourself and your intrinsic goodness •Showing yourself compassion •Embracing "good enough"

Living in survival mode with a hyper-vigilant nervous system is exhausting. "It's like having third-degree emotional burns all over your body," as a family member says.

Fixed mindset? That was me, believing change wasn't possible. But then I learned about neuroplasticity: we can rewire our brains through continuous practice like breathwork. Breathing can feel mechanical at first. But over time, it will calm your life.

I'm falling back in love with Metta (lovingkindness meditation). Every day, I repeat the following phrases silently, feeling them in my body as I say them: •May I be safe and free from harm •May I trust myself •May I feel okay in my skin •May I love and accept myself unconditionally as I am After a while, we can direct the exact phrases to others. Try it. It will open your heart.