People say women are the better communicators, but I would posit that the opposite is true; consider this exchange: @SelkieSweet7: "Sean, I need you!" Me: "What do you need?" Her: "There's an infestation of weevils!" Me: "What do you need from me?" Her: "They're going to get out and get in our food!" Me: "What can I do right now in this moment that will remedy this?" Her: "Throw away their food source!" Me: "Which is?" Her: "This great big bag of birdseed!" Then I went in there, got the birdseed, and threw it out. If women were the better communicators, I expect her first statement would have been, "Sean, can you come get this bag of birdseed and throw it out?"

I usually don't post stuff like this on Twitter, but @PreacH0921 and I made the single coolest feed I've ever seen, and it needs to be out there.

I'm one of the only people in Oklahoma who DOESN'T wear cowboy boots everywhere, and you'll find quite a few people in ten gallon hats around. I've only ever seen one person with old-style gun belt, but there are plenty with oversized buckles.

In many places it's actually illegal to stop while driving past a Buc-ees: you would be required to actually pull into the parking lot, or else you'd be disrupting traffic.

Overheard on the security camera today: @SelkieSweet7: "Ugh it's freezing in here! Why do we keep it so cold?" (the house is set to 70) 5: "Because Daddy wants it like that. Why does Daddy want it so cold?" Brooke: "Because Daddy's crazy." 3: "Because Daddy's a queer!"

How do you define a terrible dad? This is how I would define a terrible dad: the dad whose firstborn son was born pulseless and apneic, basically stillborn, but the dad himself assisted in bringing him back, so that he is alive to this day; then that dad, knowing how precious above any jewel every second that he gets to spend with that child is, has the audacity to look that beautiful child in the eyes and say, "No, buddy, I already gave you loves tonight and you really need to go to sleep." THAT is a terrible dad.

Thank you John! Thank you for letting me marry your daughter! Thank you for raising her in church! Thank you for my family and these 3 beautiful grandbabies of yours that I get the privilege of raising. You and Gayle getting saved all of those years ago has been the catalyst of building a church, evangelical ministries, work with the homeless and drug addicted, and so much more, without you ever having to preach a sermon. Every soul that has gotten saved under any of these ministries, and any subsequent souls saved down the line as the number grows and spreads can all tie back to the day John Dyer gave his life to Jesus! Now you’ve seen Him! Your soul can rejoice for eternity! Just tell Jesus you’re sending a lot more in a little while, and we can’t wait to see Him too! We love you John Dyer, until we meet again!

Keep praying, but for a different intention now. If you don't pray, pray anyway: it'll do you good.

I'm not saying it's muggy outside, but I will say that I bought a room temperature gallon of water at Walmart, and from the time I made it from the store to my truck, there was a thick layer of condensate on this room temperature jug.

People talk about the difference in time men and women spend cleaning, even when both parties are single. I wanted to weigh in on this: when I was single, I never cleaned at all. My philosophy on the matter was why on earth would I clean my house when I have a perfectly good teenage sister who agreed to do it for $50/week?

I feel like a chump for doing assisted pull-ups, but after I did a max set before getting ready for work, 1.83 started clapping and exclaimed, "Yay, Dada!" So I guess I feel a little better about it.

Being married is knowing that my wife is right 95% of the time. The rare 5% that remains is just those few times she disagrees with me.

When @SelkieSweet7 was pregnant with our first, she had this crazy idea that she didn't want the baby in the hospital (she changed her mind with subsequent children). We had a heck of a time finding someone who would go out to the MIL's house and deliver the baby that insurance would cover or who I could afford to pay. That ordeal was my midwife crisis.

My wife and I have both gained about 50 lbs above the point when we were considered to look our best. What I've learned from this is that she would've needed to gain at least 75 lbs or more in order to stop looking good, but I only needed about 30 of my 50 to stop looking good.

I consider middle aged to be the ages of middle adulthood: the stage between young adulthood and late adulthood, or ages 36-59.

I know this is a hot take, but if I had to choose a favorite activity of all time, I would not pick pushmowing in 95 degrees with a 105 index.

You can wear a tight shirt without printing. I promise nobody will notice.

I think my son asked me for the weirdest thing he's ever asked for the other day: we were getting ready for church on Sunday, and the kids were getting their nice clothes on, and 5 just randomly spoke up and said, "Can I have mai tai?" I informed him he was far too young for one of those, but I was still taken aback by the request.