This is unspeakably sad.
It's wrong -- crushingly, gravely, sorrowfully, and heinously wrong.
I'm convinced what makes a difference is to pray that Christ will be known to every person invovled.
Pia and Max are gonna do that. Let's do that.
This week, my wife and I made the very difficult decision to terminate the pregnancy due to Trisomy 21.
The choice was not made lightly. We really appreciate all of the personal stories that you guys shared with us, especially the unconditional support we received from fans with no matter what we decided.
I know some of you may be very disappointed to hear this news. We are devastated. This has been extremely traumatic for both of us, especially Ashley.
She underwent the procedure earlier this week and is on the mend. Thankfully, everything went smoothly, but emotionally we are drained.
Trisomy 21, also known as Down Syndrome, is caused by an extra chromosome. It is caused by an error in cell division, like a glitch. The odds of a baby having it is 1 in 1000.
When I first confronted this news, I was shocked but optimistic. If theyβre a little slow intellectually, then weβll make it work. I signed on to be a parent, come what mayβ¦but I just didnβt fully understand what Down Syndrome entailed.
Once we made it public, it became clear that MOST people donβt know what Down Syndrome entails (and no, itβs not the same as Autism):
50% of babies with DS have heart defects. 75% will have hearing challenges. Over 50% will have vision problems. Impaired immune function, developmental disabilities, learning disabilities, delayed physical development, poor muscle tone, structural issues with face, decreased lifespan, etcβ¦Sadly, the list is long, feel free to look it upβ¦Down Syndome isnβt a βblessingβ, it is objectively shitty from a health perspective.
I didnβt realize just how rough it is for the child, let alone the familyβ¦more often than not, they would be fully dependent on others for the rest of their life.
The miscarriage risk is also close to 50%, which made matters worseβ¦they may never see the light of day and it puts Ashley further at risk.
We spoke with doctors, friends, family and genetic counselors and learned that up to 90% of women terminate their pregnancy after learning the baby has Trisomy 21.
This was WAY higher than I expected, I thought it would be lower given that I hear so many say they kept or would keep the baby. I believe thatβs because most terminations happen privately, it feels shameful. A lot of judgment being cast.
You never think youβd be in this type of situation until it happens to you and then things change.
To all of my fans who have weighed in on this topic who have Autism, Down Syndrome or any other conditionsβ¦we appreciate you. You matter a lot and weβre glad youβre here. I commend you and your families for having the strength and courage to push forward.
As for us, we made a difficult decision that we believe in the long-run will be beneficial for our family. Thankfully, we had a choice.
It will take a little time to move on, but we are excited to try again in the future and hopefully have a better outcome.
Love you guys & thank you for understanding. β€οΈ