Joined October 2019
- Tweets 62
- Following 16
- Followers 194
- Likes 3
3 Photos and videos
6 Jan 2021
If they would've had the same energy storming area 51 as they did the capitol i could be having sex with an alien rn. I fucking hate it here.
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26 Nov 2020
Imagine spending 2 weeks wearing masks, getting tests and being extra safe just to have Thanksgiving with your loved ones, but everyone catches covid anyways from the paramedic who was there to narcan your dumbass.
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7 Nov 2020
I hope all the addicts that voted for biden in hopes of getting disability for life for their "disease" shit all over themselves during that 2021 lockdown joe.0
5 Nov 2020
They are dragging out this election like its the season finale of The Apprentice π
29 Aug 2020
Whats the catchiest song of all time that no one likes but everyone knows the words to and no matter what movie or grocery store its in you catch yourself singing it in your head, and why is it kiss me by sixpence none the richer?
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24 Aug 2020
The government can trace a covid outbreak through 82 people across 15 states but still can't find trumps tax returns,Obamas birth certificate or Hilarys emails.... right...
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25 Jul 2020
Anyone super excited for opening day of the @WNBA ?
Yea didnt think so.... im not sure why they even closed down. There is always room in the stands for all 17 people to stay 6ft apart.
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16 Jul 2020
There is only a coin shortage bc they gave all these mfers 600 a week and the crack heads aint paying in change no more
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11 Jul 2020
I stg people with the slowest cars try to drive the fastest and most reckless. Just because it took you a whole minute to reach 100 doesnt mean im going to race your 160hp shitbox in the rain.
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4 Jul 2020
Today is the last time in someones life that they will wake up with 10 full fingers, and they don't even know it yet. Happy 4th of july! πΊπ²πΊπ²πΊπ²
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22 Jun 2020
Who woulda thought that 600 dollars a week in fireworks is just what the country needed to beat covid
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26 May 2020
People who still refuse to wear a mask at the store only do so because their breath smells like doodies and they are too lazy to fix that π€’π€’
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21 May 2020
Remember in 94 when @billyjoearmweak from @GreenDay said "When masturbation's lost its fun, you're fucking lonely", 26 years later and quarantined, i finally really feel that shit.
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12 Apr 2020
Happy quarentine easter! Now bend over, buss it wide open and dm me that keaster π
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29 Mar 2020
Can't we as a whole nation just identify as cured from coronavirus, I mean its 2020 isnt that how things work now?
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25 Mar 2020
Just an fyi. While alot of the world is in mandatory quarantine, and non essential businesses are closed, an unimaginable amount of people are filing for unemployment, @pornhub_premium is free for everyone, @netflix is not.
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