Rory Jennings, stood in the middle of 90,000 cyber terrorists wearing his stone island jacket and his moody sideburns just trying to enjoy Supersonic in peace without the infernal clattering of keyboards.
This Oasis situation is dumb. It should be a queue at Wembley Stadium. Overnight. True test of dedication. Like what we had to do for the FA Cup final in 1997. All this internet wizardry is unjust, it favours the drips. Got people sending me pics of computer screens like they work at NASA, what chance have I got?