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Modern Seinfeld @SeinfeldToday

What if Seinfeld were still on the air? (Tweets by @JackPMoore and @JoshGondelman.)

Joined December 2012
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Modern Seinfeld co-author @joshgondelman has co-written a whole book! It's called "You Blew It," and it's out today! bit.ly/1MRmRYU

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George's GF wants a "no phones at dinner" rule. G: "We had a good thing going, Jerry! Now we're supposed to talk? That can only end badly!"
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After her fuck buddy texts her that she should come over to "watch Netflix," Elaine is pissed when he actually just wants to watch Netflix.
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Jerry refuses to go to a Cash Only diner. J:"They’ve seen the credit card! They know the credit card! It’s time to accept the credit card!"
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When George falls for a Twitter bot, Kramer claims he once Catfished himself. J:How’s that even possible? K:Oh I’m good Jerry. I’m real good
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Elaine’s autocorrect makes her look racist in front of her new boss. E:“Why would they even program that in?” J:“I’m sure they didn’t!"
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Kramer thinks the NSA is spying on him, so he goes "off the grid." Except he uses Jerry's phone, computer & email. "You're just on MY grid!"
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When the WiFi George usually steals suddenly has a password, he becomes addicted to trying to “hack” in. J:“Just get your own!” G:“NEVER!"
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Jerry meets an amazing woman on JDate but when he begins to suspect she's faking her Judaism, Kramer volunteers to investigate.
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George refuses to listen to his GF's voicemails, gets dumped. “It’s 2015! Send a text! I don’t want to hear your voice if I don’t have to!”
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Elaine has no idea what her BF does for a living and it’s now too late to ask. E:“Teacher, I think. Or a doctor? Wait Is ‘computers' a job?"
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When Jerry dumps a woman who works for Time Warner Cable, his Internet stops working. She won’t get it fixed unless he takes her out again.
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George goes to war with an evil barista who writes embarrassing things on George's cup instead of his name.
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George refuses to date a woman when he sees her on 2 different dating apps. G:”It’s too desperate.” J:”How’d you find out?” G:”I’m on both."
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Jerry's GF texts in the movies but acts like it's okay because she sits in the last row. GF:Who am I bothering?! J:Me! You're bothering me!
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Jerry takes a date to Tim Whatley's Super Bowl party. She dumps Jerry when he cries at a commercial."What? The dog really loved that horse!"
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A woman accuses George of harrassing her by DM-ing her. G:"I was being friendly!" E:"Oh please.There's no such thing as a 'friendly' DM."
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After Elaine's BF logs into his email on her computer, she makes the mistake of searching her name & seeing everything he's said about her.
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Kramer pitches an insane ad to McDonald’s. “Sure everyone loves your burgers but what if you made it seem like your burgers loved everyone?"
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George rejects a Tinder girl when all her photos feature multiple girls. E:”What if she’s the pretty one?” G:“How naive can you be, Elaine?"
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