The internet nobody asked for.
Joined January 2021
- Tweets 648
- Following 1
- Followers 107,490
- Likes 813
338 Photos and videos
Shit User Story retweeted
May 19
These companies truly have no idea what regular people want
May 19
One of the loudest applauses in the entire Google keynote:
Nishtha put on the new Gentle Monster Gemini glasses, tapped the side to summon Gemini, and ALL in one prompt said “take a photo and put a cartoon blimp in the sky that says Google IO 2026” and within seconds, the preview of the edited photo from nano banana appeared on her watch.
I want to spend less time on screens.
AI really is coming everywhere. And so much is driven by voice AI as the interaction mode.
#Google
94
443
12,197
979,505
Apr 16
As a…
– meeting attendee
I want…
– AI meeting notes
so that…
– I have AI meeting notes
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2
9
109
7,206
9 Sep 2025
As an...
– iPhone 16 user
I want...
– an iPhone 17
so that...
– I have an iPhone 17
#AppleEvent #iPhone16
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8
54
652
58,642
9 Jun 2025
As an…
– #iOS26 user
I want…
– a translucent UI that reflects and refracts its surroundings, delivering a new level of vitality across controls
so that…
– I can struggle to read
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255
2,423
228,511
Shit User Story retweeted
11 Jan 2022
As a…
– user
I want…
– unlabelled icons
so that…
– delight
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18
251
2,137
Shit User Story retweeted
3 Nov 2021
As an…
– Instagram user
I want to…
– expand fifty-three comments, three comments at a time, in reverse chronological order
so that…
– I can read the conversation
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12
227
2,376
9 Sep 2024
As an...
– iPhone 15 owner
I want...
– an iPhone 16
so that...
– I have an iPhone 16
#AppleEvent #iPhone16
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14
149
1,486
133,762
Shit User Story retweeted
28 May 2021
As a...
– website visitor
I want...
– multiple large stylesheets hosted in various places
so that...
– I can briefly experience the internet of 1998
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284
2,821
Shit User Story retweeted
18 Jun 2021
As a...
– user pasting text from multiple sources
I want to...
– paste the source formatting by default
so that...
– all of my documents have that professional, ransom-note vibe
31
592
3,730
6 Jun 2024
As a…
– user
I want…
– AI in every product
so that…
–
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31
369
1,985
165,880
6 Jun 2024
Inspired by my ✨AI-optimised ✨ washing machine.
4
15
281
22,790
Shit User Story retweeted
1 Jun 2021
As a...
– consumer
I want to...
– see my favourite multinational corporations update their social media graphics on June 1st
so that...
– it distracts me from their presence and business relationships in nations with limited LGBTQ rights
14
808
3,100
31 May 2024
As an…
– Instagram user
I want…
– an overwhelming number of options displayed in a wacky pile of buttons
so that…
– I can add fucking everything to my story
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3
48
402
28,439
23 Apr 2024
As a…
– Twitter user
I want…
– access to the world’s most accurate real-time information source, a global town square for communication
so that…
– I can be repeatedly told to look between letters on my keyboard
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7
91
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40,973
Shit User Story retweeted
6 Jul 2021
As a…
– website visitor
I want to…
– patiently wait for content to load dynamically
so that…
– I am awash with delight
18
245
2,074
20 Mar 2024
As a…
– Twitter user
I want…
– free speech
so that…
– ░P░U░S░S░Y░ ░I░N░ ░B░I░O░
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203
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122,354
Shit User Story retweeted
1 Feb 2021
As a...
– registering user
I want to...
– have my email address begin to validate after I type the first character
so that...
– I understand that 'c' isn't considered sufficient and I should continue to type
17
276
2,169
Shit User Story retweeted
8 Apr 2021
As a...
– restaurant website visitor
I want to...
– have the restaurant phone number appear as an uncopiable raster image on page 9 of their 48mb stock-photo-filled pdf menu
So that...
– I can call them
12
236
1,992
22 Feb 2024
As a…
– Google user
I want to…
– sign in to my account
so that…
– I am signed in to my account
ALT Image repeats text of tweet content in image form, with a banner notifying the reader "A new look is coming soon - Shit User Story is improving its shitpost format with a more modern look and feel"
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Shit User Story retweeted
15 Feb 2021
As a...
– Twitter user
I want to...
– have the timeline refresh a couple of seconds after opening the app
So that...
– the tweet I am half-way through reading is replaced with a more relevant, promoted tweet.
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858
5,540