@SimonPuppet profile picture
limp brisket @SimonPuppet

catch me as the lead actor in Willow (1988)

Joined April 2013
  • Tweets 2,921
  • Following 1,066
  • Followers 545
69 Photos and videos
Trump and Rogan melded bodies and are walking around screaming with 4 legs and 2 heads ‘the substance’ style? No? Nevermind then
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Because of climate change, at this moment, every single actor on the PLANET is now only 3 degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon.
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Clementine Italian soda? You mean FANTA
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Turns out your either a Sinéad or a peewee
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Joker origins: Napoleon
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limp brisket retweeted
Danny Polishchuk
@Dannyjokes
3 Jul 2023
Can’t believe neither me or @thelevfershow made this list
Noah Gittell@noahgittell
3 Jul 2023
I'm writing a little something about the Cool Jew. To my mind, Elliot Gould invented it, Jeff Goldblum carried the torch, and Ben Stiller was the last to pull it off. Who am I forgetting? I don't think Sandler is cool enough, and Chalamet isn't Jew enough.
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Dont be tempted to do a submarine jokes. Go deeper
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Same :(
Dr Jordan B Peterson
@jordanbpeterson
23 Jun 2023
Dear @elonmusk I cannot understand how this can possibly be. Am I missing something?
Community note
There is a note at the top of analytics.twitter.com where the image came from which states that they are working on improvements to the site and as a result some metrics are missing. pbs.twimg.com/media/FzUrIBsW…
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If you live in a fish tank you think that shitty sandcastle is buckingham palace
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Extremely progressive insta story feed be like: -BURY THE RICH BENEATH THE EARHT THEY DESTROYED -check out this salad!
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limp brisket retweeted
Edmonton StreetFest@YegStreetFest
9 Jun 2023
We are delighted to present the amazing design by Vikki Wiercinski for this year's Edmonton International Street Performers Festival!! There is only one month left until the fun and amazement begins! Mark your calendars, July 7th-16th at Churchill Square!! See you there! 📷
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Podcasts made me realize how boring people really are :(
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Ive been farting and aiming it at new york for decades. Wildfire smoke is much better.
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Im gunna cry when Billy Joel dies
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limp brisket retweeted
Rachel Doležal
@DialloNkechi
6 Jun 2023
#HappyPride2023 #bi
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Its been over a decade since I last saw someone riding dirty 😭
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1-Jimi Hendrix 2-Jimmy Page 3-Ace Frehely 4-Adrian Smith 5-Lindsay Buckingham guys who's ass I could kick no problem anyday
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All apps are dating apps if you got game. I met my girl on Paramount
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Accidentally told the uber driver i love you but meant to say ‘i fucking love you’
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Game show where you guess which song was written by Ai: so you think you can blade run?
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