Smart-mouth. Coquette(ish). Unserious. Sports Junkie. Trivia Champ. 2016 Game 7 World Series Attendee. Dislikes: Sausage & Karl Malone. Loves: Jason Bateman

Joined December 2009
7,387 Photos and videos
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Solid life advice
If you ever find a pretty girl who keeps a score at a baseball game, marry her.
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Alexis retweeted
We have this, but kids cancer research was deemed wasteful spending.
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I know everyone hates them, but an HOA would have prevented this.
ENERGY IS HIGH AT THE WHITE HOUSE AHEAD OF THE @UFC FIGHT. 🔥🇺🇸 SOON 🔜
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Again, I am right where I want to be… Go NY!
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This is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read and it’s about chips and salsa.
USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving. Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free. I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these." "They just come with the table, man." They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner. This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat. I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared. "Did we…?" "Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless." Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined. My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude." Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man. I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy. Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived. I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most. Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.
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I told you guys at the WBC - the Asian/Latino alliance in international competition is unlike anything else in sports.
Mexicans dancing and singing GANGNAM STYLE with the Koreans in Mexico after South Korea's World Cup win 😭
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Soccer people: How bad is Paraguay? I need to understand how big of a grain of salt to take with that win.
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Update: they aren’t even in Wrigley as of 10:20
Living so close to Wrigley, I have been gifted a ticket to this cursed Mumford and Sons concert that is allegedly starting 75 minutes after a doomsday alert went to all of our phones. If it happens I’m walking over in my PJs and will report back on this mess.
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We’ve hit midnight! The Lakeview Facebook group is going to be next-level crazy tomorrow.
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Final thoughts from a girl who decided to go to a concert where she only knew 1.5 songs in her pajamas at the very last minute.
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Lead singer of Mumford & Sons mid-song at Wrigley “Will you sing it with us?” Internet Dad & @TheNotoriousLEX “Sing what now with the where what?” The other 35,000 here seemed into it though.
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Living so close to Wrigley, I have been gifted a ticket to this cursed Mumford and Sons concert that is allegedly starting 75 minutes after a doomsday alert went to all of our phones. If it happens I’m walking over in my PJs and will report back on this mess.
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Update Thread:
Update: they aren’t even in Wrigley as of 10:20
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I am exactly where I want to be.
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Update: The Cubs have ruined my night
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Update: The Knicks have made up for the Cubs’ bullshit
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