If the government could tax your thoughts, they’d have a GS-13 bureaucrat on it yesterday. Picture it: some lifer in a windowless room in D.C., sipping taxpayer-funded coffee, staring at a blank wall with the focused intensity of a monk. His official job title? “Senior Policy Analyst, Thought Revenue Optimization Division.” His performance review depends entirely on how creatively he can monetize what’s bouncing around inside your skull. Every fleeting daydream about quitting your job, every shower epiphany, every late-night “what if”…. all potential revenue streams. They’d probably call it the “Cognitive Fairness Act” and sell it as “closing loopholes in the human experience.” And who writes these brilliant ideas into law? Your friendly neighborhood representatives. The same folks who swear they’re “public servants” while treating you like a walking ATM with opinions. Big Daddy Government doesn’t just want your money. It wants to own the very machinery that generates it… right down to the thoughts in your head. They haven’t figured out how to do it yet. Give them time. They’re working on it.