What's your opinion?

why are all 19 yr olds so hot

nobody can explain why men randomly become more attractive after getting in a relationship and it's really bothering me

A good husband and father combines two things: deep love and clear authority. Both are equally essential. One without the other destroys marriage and family.

ये हैं दौलतगिरी जी महाराज। 12 साल की खड़ी तपस्या... जिसमें से 5 साल पूरे हो चुके हैं। जहाँ एक सामान्य इंसान 12 घंटे भी खड़ा रह पाना मुश्किल समझता है, वहाँ ये महात्मा 12 साल से बिना रुके, बिना बैठे, बिना लेटे... सिर्फ खड़े-खड़े भगवान का स्मरण कर रहे हैं। पूरा थ्रेड पढ़ें 1/2

ये हैं दौलतगिरी जी महाराज। 12 साल की खड़ी तपस्या... जिसमें से 5 साल पूरे हो चुके हैं। जहाँ एक सामान्य इंसान 12 घंटे भी खड़ा रह पाना मुश्किल समझता है, वहाँ ये महात्मा 12 साल से बिना रुके, बिना बैठे, बिना लेटे... सिर्फ खड़े-खड़े भगवान का स्मरण कर रहे हैं। पूरा थ्रेड पढ़ें 1/2

Anecdotal, but this has been my experience as well When i was clueless about women, i was used and manipulated by some Those days are long over The landscape looks much different now The Truth will indeed set you free ...but it will piss you off thoroughly on the way

We'll rebuild this place, brick by brick.

In girlspeak, "any girl would be lucky to date you" translates to "you are a beta male with no masculinity, therefore I am not interested in you, but good luck with other women"

Do not waste a second trying to persuade others of your virtue or vice, or if you're a good person or bad, such judgments are irrelevant. Let them think as they wish, anyone preoccupied with others is, by default, intellectually idle. Do your thing.

Real and ties into this

Your self-discovery should not be paid for with another person’s heart.

Making a woman feel safe is the secret to attraction that the redpill never quite got

Your emotional unavailability is far more punishing than your anger could ever be.

EVERYTHING A MAN MUST KNOW ABOUT WOMEN The Complete Guide to Understanding Feminine Nature ─────────── ① THE DELUDED MAN & THE SANE WOMAN — WHY OPPOSITES ATTRACT Women love a deluded man. They are always searching for a deluded man, somebody who is mad and insane. Because the insane is very attractive: the mad, the deluded, has a certain magnetism. He is full of possibilities, dreams. Women love a dreamer. And men? Men love a sane woman — otherwise, they will REALLY go mad — to keep them back on the earth. The woman represents the earth. A man needs a woman because he has no roots in his own being. He needs a woman, the warm earth, the un-penetrated covers, dark soil, where he can have his roots and remain rooted in the earth. He is afraid — he has wings but no roots. And he is afraid that if he is not holding to the earth he may be gone, he may disappear into the infinite sky and there may be no coming back. That fear keeps people running after women. And a woman has no wings. She has roots, great roots; a woman is pure earth. And she is afraid that if she remains alone she will never be able to fly into the unknown. A woman can’t be a dreamer like a man. It is not just accidental that women have not created great poetry or music. They don’t have wings, they are very earthly, very pragmatic, very real — and sane, of course. They are so sane, that’s why they don’t write poetry. You have to have some insanity to write poetry. You have to have some delusions, megalomania, then only can you write poetry. A woman makes a laundry list, not a poem — a shopping list. Her concern is immediate. She talks about the neighbours; she is not worried about Iran or Israel. She simply laughs at the people, at men — why are they so much concerned? And they get into such excitement! If something is happening in Israel, it is happening in Israel — why are you worried? And the woman in the neighbourhood has escaped with somebody else — that is the real thing; it is so immediate. Women are not interested in gospels, they are interested in gossips. Both the words come from the same root. When it is about the faraway it is a gospel, when it is about the close-by it is gossip. When it is immediate it is gossip, when it is ultimate it is a gospel. ② EARTH & SKY — WHY MEN AND WOMEN NEED EACH OTHER Man cannot live without woman, because then he loses roots. He simply becomes a vagabond. Then he belongs nowhere. Just see a man who has no woman: he belongs nowhere, he has no home, he becomes driftwood, just waves take him anywhere — unless he gets entangled with a woman somewhere; then the home arises. Researchers say that the home is the creation of the woman. If man had lived alone, there would have been no home and no civilization either. He would have been a wanderer, a hunter; he would have gone from one corner to the other corner. Look: man is trying to go to the other planets; no-one has reached the moon. And women simply laugh at the whole lunacy. Men must be lunatics, they are so much interested in reaching the lunar, the moon. For what? You can’t do shopping there. There seems to be no point at all! And there are no people, no gossiping, nothing of the sort — just empty desert. Man without woman is a wanderer, a vagabond. Hence, sooner or later, he needs to get rooted. The woman becomes his earth. Unless a man finds something in him that can become his earth, unless the man finds his own inner woman, he will have to look for the outer woman. Yes, there have been men who have lived without women — a Buddha or a Jesus. But they too have not really lived without a woman — they found a deeper woman in their own being. Because man is both man and woman, and woman is also both woman and man. It has to be so, because you come from two persons — your father and mother. Your father has contributed the man in you, your mother has contributed the woman in you. Each person is fifty percent man, fifty percent woman. Unless you turn inside yourself and find your woman or man there, you will have to look outside. The outside is a substitute. ─────────── ③ THE POWER PARADOX — WHY WOMEN HOLD POWER OVER MEN Why do you allow women to hold power over you? Because without them you will be insane. And the same is true about women — without men they will be too sane, and to be too sane is also a different kind of insanity. To be too sane becomes heavy; to be too sane, then you cannot sing, you cannot dance. So a woman needs somebody who can dream for her, and a man needs somebody who can become a home for him. Then there is no need to look out. Still you can go on loving women, but there will be no clinging. And you will not become possessive or possessed. When you have found your unity inside, you will still be loving men but it will not be an obsession, it will be just a sharing. And then love is a joy. If you cannot be alone, naturally you feel powerless before the woman or before the man. If you cannot be alone, then your woman is your need, then you are dependent on her. And you are annoyed — your independence is lost. You are annoyed because she is having so much power over you. ④ A WOMAN IN LOVE VS A WOMAN ALONE Have you seen a woman without love and one in love? They smell differently — actually, they smell differently; their fragrance is different. When a woman is alone she has sadness all around her: depressed, lonely, forlorn, in a despair, just anxiety. The moment she falls in love she starts blooming. Something immediately opens up. Then she has beauty. A woman not in love shrinks, closes up; she starts living in a shut-upness. She closes the doors and the windows. There is nobody to wait for — why keep the windows open or the doors open? She starts living in a kind of grave; she is no more alive. She starts dying, she becomes suicidal. Just mathematics, just arithmetic, just sanity, is not enough. Some poetry is needed to keep balance. And man alone looks lost; he does not know who he is. Unless he sees himself in the eyes of a loving woman, he will never know who he is. He can go on doing enlightenment intensives and go on asking “Who am I? Who am I?” And no answer will come — unless he looks into the eyes of love. Only then will he be reflected, only then in the mirror will he see who he is. The woman gives him form, substance. The woman makes him aware of who he is. By her love she creates the man. It is not only that you are created by your mother in her womb; you are created by each woman whenever you fall in love. Whenever you fall in love the woman gives you shape, colour, polish; she makes you human. Otherwise, man will be very very barbarous, violent, aggressive, uncaring, uncompassionate. But the problem is that both depend on each other and both feel hurt — nobody wants to depend. And on whomsoever you depend, you will never be able to forgive him or her. You will take revenge. That’s why lovers go on fighting. The fight is nothing but to show that “I am still independent — what do you think?” The woman thinks, “I am not so dependent on him. I can still bloom alone. I will still be happy without you — what do you think of yourself?” Hence they fight, just to test their independence. But within hours the fight is gone and they are hugging each other. Because the moment they start separating from each other, they start feeling suffocated, hungry, thirsty. They start losing whatsoever they had. The warmth is missed, the man starts feeling cold. And if there is nobody to hold the woman she starts feeling absolutely lonely. If there is no love we are all alone. If love is not possible, then loneliness is the truth and has to be accepted. Only love gives you glimpses that loneliness is not ultimate. ─────────── ⑤ EVERY MAN IS A HENPECKED HUSBAND Every man allows that power. And resists it. Every husband becomes a henpecked husband — every, I say. There is no other kind of husband. Whatsoever the pretensions, the only kind that really exists is the henpecked husband. When the tree takes so much nourishment from the earth, it becomes dependent; it cannot remain independent. And when the earth sees its own joy, its celebration, its potential, being expressed by the tree — the green foliage and the red flowers, and the branches raised high into the sky — that the earth always wanted, to have wings, and now they are there — how can the earth remain independent? Man and woman exist in a kind of interdependence. Independent, they are half — hungry, starved for the other. Interdependence is the truth — but then independence is lost. It is not an accident that all the monks of the world, down the ages, have been escaping from woman. The woman represents the world. They are really escaping from the feeling that they are dependent; they want to be independent. This is a human phenomenon, not personal at all. ⑥ THE MAGIC OF THE DELUDED MAN The woman cannot feel happy without a man. Without a man she cannot flow in dreams. A deluded man is more attractive than an ordinary man. That’s why women fall in love with people who have great illusions about themselves. An ordinary man is one who has no illusions; no woman is attracted towards an ordinary man. A deluded man looks magical. He has magic. His eyes flare up with something unknown, and that is the desire of the woman. He has the sense of possibility — that sense of possibility gives him the quality of magic. In nature, watch: the bird with the best dance and the best song gets the best female. And so is the case with human beings too. Ever observe how many good-looking women hang around the musicians, singers and actors? For what? Something magical, something not of this earth, something of the beyond — and they immediately become attracted. This is a natural attraction; both fulfill each other. And this is going to remain. ─────────── ⑦ THE INNER MARRIAGE — ARDHANARISHWAR (SHIVA-SHAKTI) If you are a man, then your conscious is masculine, your unconscious is feminine. If you are a woman, then your conscious is feminine, your unconscious is masculine. Just dive deep into the unconscious. And that is what meditation is all about. Go on loving, go on experiencing the joys and the miseries that love brings. They are all needed to make you ripe and mature. And meanwhile go on meditating. Both these processes, love and meditation, if they continue simultaneously, slowly slowly will make you aware that whatsoever you are finding outside can be found inside in a far better way. And once that happens, then your unconscious and conscious meet — you become ARDHANARISHWAR (Shiva-Shakti) — you become man and woman together. Then there is a difference, a total difference; your quality is no more the same. Then you can still love a woman, but it is no more a dependence. It is now a sharing. You can still love a man, but it is just pure joy, it is just overflowing energy. You have so much that you have to give it to somebody. But you can be alone too — and as happy as together. When a man is capable of being alone and as happy as when he is together, then he will never be in the grip of anybody else. He will not feel that “Somebody holds power upon me.” Then you will not be fighting with your woman or man, because then there is no question of fight. Then you are two independent people sharing out of your independence, sharing out of your immense freedom. But there is no necessity to share, it is for no other motive — just because you are overflowing. Then you don’t feel hurt, then you don’t feel that you have become a slave. Then you remain a master and she remains a master. And nobody possesses anybody. All possessiveness disappears. ⑨ PURE ENERGY — THE SACRED FUSION (TANTRA) It is a meeting of pure energy, and only pure energies can dissolve into each other — because if you have a solid personality it will obstruct dissolution. In Tantra, this “solid personality” is the ego, the accumulated baggage of impressions (samskaras) and past karmic imprints. The ego acts like a wall — preventing the energetic melting needed for divine union. Girls become solid once they go through heartbreak and bodily exploitation — meaning losing of virginity to a man whom they haven’t married. This act doesn’t just leave physical traces — it leaves emotional hooks, energetic imprints, and karmic debts. Every man she bonds with carves a memory into her body and subtle mind (chitta). This fragmentation hardens her aura, making her less capable of total surrender in future unions. As girls have more water element, that’s why they remain soft and talk sweetly. In Ayurveda and Tantra, woman is said to be born of jala tattva (water element) — fluid, cool, nurturing, and deeply receptive. Her sweetness is the expression of inner liquidity, a sign of her natural feminine flow (soma shakti). But once breakup happens and body exploitation happens, they become angry, frustrated, which increases the fire element within them. Now the agni tattva (fire element) rises. Her inner water dries. Where there was surrender, now there is suspicion. Where there was sweetness, now there is sharpness. This shift is not just emotional — it is elemental. So then they start acting more logically, not emotionally — meaning now they are masculine and less feminine. This is the essence of polarity reversal. The more a woman thinks from mind instead of heart, the more Shakti turns into inverted energy — masculine traits begin to dominate, and true yin softness disappears. She may seem empowered, but she is spiritually disintegrated. Only pure energies, liquid, can enter into each other and become one. This is what the Upanishads call “samyoga” — the sacred fusion of souls. If you put two rocks together, they may be together but they cannot become one. Two egos can lie next to each other, have sex — but they remain two. They do not merge. But if you pour water into water, it becomes one. If you are a virtuous man, then only with a virtuous woman (you are her first love and she is virgin), merging will happen. Otherwise, bodies will be shared — nothing more than that. The body may act, but if hearts and karmas are broken, only friction remains, not fusion. The world calls it sex. The seers call it soulless transaction. ⑩ THE MALE MIND VS THE FEMALE MIND There is a difference between the male mind and the female mind; their functioning is different. They are polar opposites — never forget that. Spiritually they are exactly the same, but physiologically they are poles apart; they function in different ways. Man is more physical than woman, man is more extrovert than woman. The woman is more psychological and more introvert. That’s why there are so many magazines like Playboy with nude women on their covers and pictures of nude women inside — and millions of copies are sold. So much pornography exists all over the world, but it is all a male idea. The woman is not as much interested in the nude man as man is interested in the nude woman. When a man and a woman are in deep, loving embrace, the woman immediately closes her eyes. Kiss a woman, and she closes her eyes. But the man watches himself kissing the woman, watches the woman kissed, watches her reactions, watches continuously whether she is getting an orgasm or not. He remains more or less an outsider, a spectator. He is more interested in watching than in BEING in it. The woman simply closes her eyes. She is less concerned with the man and what is happening to him; she is more concerned with her inner being, what is happening there. Women are not interested in pornography; their real interest is in their inner processes. These differences are so great that they make for different lifestyles. ─────────── ⭎ MARRIAGE — WHO BENEFITS MORE? Modern research has certainly found a very strange-looking fact: Men are happier being married than not — because when they are not married they simply feel lonely. When they are married, even if the marriage is miserable, it is better than to be lonely; at least there is something to keep you occupied. Misery also keeps you occupied and man always wants to remain occupied — something on the outside so that he need not go in, so he can keep his eyes open. The woman is not so interested in the outside. So when a woman is unmarried she feels more alone than lonely. And she can enjoy her aloneness better than a man because she is more inner-directed — she is more selfish, in a way. She is self-centered. The man is other-centered; he is constantly thinking of others. The woman is thinking more about herself. At the most, she remains interested in the neighbourhood — who is fooling around with whom. She is not much concerned about Vietnam or Iran. No woman has asked whether heaven really exists, is hell a reality? She is not concerned about these things. She is more concerned with her clothes than with God. Hence, she can remain alone in a more healthy way than man; he feels very lonely. If he can’t get his morning newspaper he starts freaking out! He has to know what is happening in the whole world. He can’t be alone. The woman simply laughs. The woman deep down knows boys are just boys — let them talk nonsense! They call it philosophy, theology — they are very skillful in giving great names to stupid things. ⭏ WHY MAN NEEDS WOMAN MORE THAN WOMAN NEEDS MAN That’s why man will commit suicide if he is lonely. Marriage is a must for him. He needs a woman for many things: → She gives him a grounding — the woman is very earthly, earth-bound → She gives him roots into the earth → The woman becomes a home for him → Without the woman he is homeless, a vagabond, driftwood Still, there is going to be conflict, there is going to be misery, there is going to be constant nagging — it is inevitable because they are such polar opposites; their interests never meet. Only very stupid and stubborn people never become henpecked. A little intelligence and the man understands it: that it is better to listen to whatsoever she says and follow it. Otherwise twenty-four hours a day she will be after you. She will not leave you any rest. It is better to do whatsoever she is saying and be finished with it, so you can read your newspaper! All that nagging and all that misery can be tolerated because the woman fulfills a certain very deep need: she makes you earth-bound and she takes care of your body. She nourishes, she cares, she loves; she makes you feel loved, needed — she gives you a deep contentment. Without her, you simply don’t know who you are. Without her you are always a lost child. She mothers you. Hence it happens that married men are happier than unmarried men. Life does not follow logic; life has its own strange ways. The unmarried man is without roots, without nourishment, without warmth. He is cold, living in a cold world; he goes on shrinking and dying. The woman gives warmth, gives life, makes him feel at home, helps him to remain together. Without the woman he starts falling apart. ─────────── THE WOMAN’S INDEPENDENCE — AND WHY MAN FEARS IT The woman can be more happy alone than married. Because she can make herself rooted without the man; the man is not such a great need. She can be more independent than the man — she IS more independent. Just because the woman is more independent, down the ages man has tried to make her dependent in other ways — economically, socially. Naturally, she is more independent and that hurts the man and his ego, so he has tried to make her dependent in some way; artificial dependence has been created for her. Economically she has been paralyzed, she has to depend on man. This is a compensation and a consolation. Politically, socially, she has been thrown out of the society; she has been forced to remain in the home so that man can feel that “I am not the only one dependent, she is also dependent on me.” This is a psychological strategy of the ego, of the male ego. Otherwise, if the woman is given total freedom — economic, social, political — man will look really poor compared to her. The woman is stronger than man in many ways. She lives longer than man, five years longer. If man’s average lifespan is seventy, then woman’s will be seventy-five. She must have more resistance. And after giving birth to ten, twelve children — just think of a man giving birth to ten, twelve children — he will be finished long before! The woman has great resistance, great tolerance of things. The woman is more balanced; physiologically, chemically, she is more balanced. That’s why she looks more beautiful — her beauty has roots in her physiological balance. Man has an inner imbalance, hence goes berserk more easily, goes mad very easily. Any woman can drive any man mad, it is such a simple phenomenon! Women are ill less than men; men are ill more, they suffer more illnesses. One hundred fifteen boys are born for each hundred girls, and by the time they reach the age of marriage, fifteen boys have disappeared. ⭑ SEXUALITY — THE GREAT DIVIDE Men’s needs are more physiological; women’s needs are more psychological. Hence the woman always feels as if she is exploited in marriage. And her feeling is true, because man’s interest is basically sexual; everything else is just decorative, it is not essential. The simple reason is that their sexualities are very different. Man has a local sexuality; his sex is confined to the genital organs, it is not spread all over his body. The woman is totally sexual, her whole body is sexual; it is not genital. Hence a woman needs longer foreplay before she can go really into lovemaking. And the man is always in a hurry; his love is nothing but a hit-and-run affair! The woman is not even warmed up, and the man is getting dressed and going away! The man is finished. His sexuality is genital. The woman is more total; her whole body has a deep sexuality in it. Unless her whole body becomes involved she can’t have orgasmic experience. And if she can’t have orgasmic experiences she becomes disinterested in sex. So wives are disinterested in sex. Man’s whole interest is in sex. Their understanding is different. The woman always feels cheated, used, as if she is a machine. She feels used as a means; it is humiliating. For men, sex is not a spiritual phenomenon but only a physiological release. For women it is a spiritual phenomenon. Hence the woman always feels offended; unless love happens as part of a great spiritual experience she is unable to cooperate in it. She can be part of it in a cold way. It is because of this situation that millions of women have completely forgotten what orgasm means; they have become frozen. It is due to man’s non-understanding about the difference. Each man and each woman needs a great education about it — that they are different; their physiologies are different, their psychologies are different. And they have to understand each other’s psychology, each other’s physiology. They have to be taught. Sex has a far deeper significance. It is not only for reproduction; it has a multidimensional quality to it. It is also fun, it is play, it is prayer, it is meditation, it is religion, it is spirituality. Sex has the whole spectrum; it is the whole rainbow, all the colors from the lowest to the highest. ⭒ THE PARADOX OF HIDING & EXPOSING It is necessary to understand that among the many differences there are between the male mind and the female mind, one prominent difference is this: while a man is interested in seeing a woman in the nude — he is a voyeur — the woman is not that interested in seeing a naked man. It is amusing that a man is deeply interested in the nude body of a woman. Women are not in the least interested in nude males. You may not have noticed but in deep moments of love it is the man who wants to disrobe his beloved; it is not so with the woman. While making love a man keeps his eyes open, but the woman invariably keeps hers closed. Even when she is being kissed by her lover, a woman usually shuts her eyes. She is not interested in seeing; she is interested in absorbing her lover, in being one with him. But a man is deeply interested in seeing his woman, and it is this male interest which gives rise to a desire in the woman to hide herself. So women all the world over hide their bodies in many ways. But this desire to hide their bodies creates a problem for them, because they cease to be attractive if they hide too much. So they do two things together — they hide their bodies and at the same time they hide them in a manner that they are exposed. They hide and expose their bodies together. The same clothes are used to hide them and to expose them in a clever way. They hide because they are afraid of voyeurs in general, but they need to expose their bodies in order to attract men as well.