Joined October 2016
- Tweets 4,342
- Following 2,694
- Followers 4,516
- Likes 26,299
2,552 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
18 May 2020
Do you know how to find out where the ingredients in your supplements originate from?
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
19 Jan 2024
OK! OK! That was just a joke! I really am a great uncle! Here are some actual tips for being a great uncle for any dudes that have siblings who are doing it without protection.
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
10 Dec 2023
Who was the most autistic live action batman? I need help for a video I'm making.
1 Adam West
2 Michael Keaton
3 Val Kilmer
4 George Clooney
5 Christian Bale
6 Ben Affleck
7 Robert Pattinson
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
2 Jul 2023
Don't worry, you can see more than 600 tweets per day by going to instagram or reddit or Elon's Mom's House.
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25 Dec 2022
And that’s how I saved Christmas 🎄
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
22 Dec 2022
Today’ humor! We have -47 wind chills today!😳🥶
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19 Dec 2022
This is dumb
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15 Dec 2022
Don't forget! Today marks the beginning of 2022's War on Christmas!
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
2 Dec 2022
What problem should I solve next?
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29 Nov 2022
Some people are heroes, and we call those people Americans.
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30 Nov 2022
can't argue with a guy with a gun 🤦♀️ whatever you say gorgeous
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28 Nov 2022
Netflix's Dahmer & Chill #netflixandchill #DahmerNetflix
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
28 Nov 2022
Cyber Monday < Cyber Sex Monday
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
28 Nov 2022
Club Owner: When I met you I thought you were creepy but you've become one of my favorite comics.
Me: Thanks, what made you stop thinking I was creepy?
Club Owner: No, I still think you're creepy.
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
27 Nov 2022
Too often, I have to tell women "I don't have any kids" when they ask me for child support
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
27 Nov 2022
You're really missing out with Flamigo
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26 Nov 2022
Ok, tbh, I would never go to a hs reunion
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
26 Nov 2022
which astrological sign is the worst at stand up comedy?
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Tortoise & Rooster Trading retweeted
25 Nov 2022
My dad can't help himself
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