I’ve been robbed and ridiculed in daycare centers and night schools #BLM
Joined November 2009
- Tweets 18,442
- Following 2,021
- Followers 232
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1,038 Photos and videos
Steely Liz retweeted
When the stuff at target starts sounding like a diy venue lineup
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Steely Liz retweeted
Jun 15
Somewhere in West Village there's a guy who commutes to midtown everyday on the PATH and has never been to New Jersey
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Steely Liz retweeted
Unforgettable photofinish for the first pro victory for Liam Slock 😂🏆
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Jun 15
Winter Me: “I will definitely lose like 15 pounds if I have to put on a bathing suit every day to get into the hot tub.”
Summer Me: “I will take this ice-cold glass of Mexican Coke into the hot tub with me and rewatch ‘The Sopranos.’”
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Jun 14
The posts about the “German Guy” on his roadtrip aren’t real either. Maybe he’s a real person but the whole situation is manufactured and stupid. And you’re all really dumb for falling for it and liking it. You don’t even know advertising when you see it anymore.
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Jun 14
Sunday Shed Drama: not even taking a picture of this but a shelf with extra tile on it collapsed and there’s broken tile everywhere so I’m looking for this Zyn I got for free at a South Dakota gas station in September. Was stashing it for a rainy day but it’s lost and gone. Haha
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Steely Liz retweeted
Jun 13
whoever designs online portals for local governments is making user interface decisions so bizarre and hostile they actually verge on avant-garde
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Jun 13
Ok so I listened to the album and I can see where the girl dads enjoy it sonically, but the lyrics are ultra “cringe”- TS “Showgirl”-style. So man-centered. Feel sorry for today’s youth and etc.
Jun 13
It’s kinda sweet how all the girl dad critic types go to bat for Olivia R. When I was a kid, I rode around w my dad in his mid-life crisis Mustang, listening to the radio and he’d be like, “this song is about going on a date with a woman who is really a man in London in the 70s.”
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Jun 13
I made serious cash (for a high school kid) in the 90s making copies of VHS tapes of various Smashing Pumpkins concerts and selling them. We had a tv in the living room I had all rigged up for this. People would mail me checks or money orders. Funny stuff, man. Forgot about it.
Jun 12
Remember before HDMI cables where you had to match the colors to the TV like you were diffusing a bomb
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Jun 13
It’s kinda sweet how all the girl dad critic types go to bat for Olivia R. When I was a kid, I rode around w my dad in his mid-life crisis Mustang, listening to the radio and he’d be like, “this song is about going on a date with a woman who is really a man in London in the 70s.”
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Jun 12
Explaining “Clavicular” to my 75 year old mother. Friday night baby!
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Jun 10
I don’t think Holden would be on social media. Phonies and all that. Etc.
Jun 10
Catcher in the Rye is a book about a deeply annoying teenager that adults decided was profound because they forgot what teenagers are actually like. Holden Caulfield would be insufferable on social media and we would all mute him immediately.
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Jun 10
I should start soap opera themed day camp for old ladies. For $275/week I can host your crazy mothers in a room I made up to look like Victor’s kidnapping den from The Young and the Restless (insert theme here)
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Jun 8
Seinfeld-style, but what is the deal w handymen? Why can’t they come when they say they’re going to? Why don’t they ever have the proper tools? When you find one who is half decent, why do they disappear? I pay in cash and stay out of their way. I don’t think it’s me. What gives?
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Steely Liz retweeted
Jun 7
american imagining a better time: “remember when walmart was open at night”
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Jun 6
Was nice to see the Big Thief live from Primavera Sound. Thanks, Amazon, I guess. I broke my foot recently and decided to cancel my trip to Spain to see their next few dates so. Don’t worry, I’ll be on the US tour hahaha (no one was worried; no one cares) #primaverasound #ps26
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Steely Liz retweeted
Jun 5
Not to sound like a boomer, but people having meltdowns about this is exactly why it’s a good idea
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Jun 5
Weekend at Bernie’s is such a fav
Jun 4
Trump appears to be completely passed out asleep during his 3pm Oval Office announcement
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Jun 5
I got my dog out of the house all day yesterday so she didn’t harass the handyman and left my elderly mother in charge and this was such a mistake and waste of everyone’s time that I’m just going to bury myself in my septic tank.
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Jun 4
Imagine if you held elected officials to the same standards as Phoebe Bridgers ticket lottery winners.
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