I still think about how crazy it is that cats, previously a wild animal, chose to just move in with us and get us to do their bidding. Have they domesticated us to their own advantage the way we have other animals?

Back at work, in the shit office with over 200 unread emails in my inbox, and a pile of meetings added to my diary. Time is running out for my real family to claim me and give me my inheritance, as I was clearly swapped at birth.

I may have overdone it at the gym yesterday. The DOMS is real.

Recent photos I’ve taken while wandering the Midwest with my camera

Enjoying a day off thanks to a sport I have no interest in and a game that happened yesterday.

But some of the best people I know are cyclists

Had another weird night time experience - dark mass rising up from the side of the bed last night. The one in the early hours of Saturday had eyes, this one did not. Very strange and I was definitely awake both times. I did ask for a haunting, maybe I got one?

Typical Waitrose reviewer. The oysters are small, just say the oysters were small, Bruce.

Might make nachos, but with roast potatoes instead of corn chips.

Christina: “Exiting sex work is easier said than done. After years of working in brothels I had very little to put on a CV and my experience of working life outside sex work was minimal and outdated. After struggling for a couple of years to even get an interview, I managed to find a job in a bar. I was terrified my past would come back to haunt me and eventually it did when a customer found out my guilty secret. People who had once been friendly towards me became cool and distant. I felt humiliated and ashamed. I went home one day and couldn’t face going back. After months struggling to get by on benefits, I found a job as a receptionist at a brothel I used to work at. The environment was often degrading and traumatic but it somehow felt a lot less intimidating than normal life. I guess I never realised just what I was signing up for on my first shift in a brothel. It’s only years later when the sacrifices start to outweigh any financial benefits. Unfortunately, the way out isn’t quite so easy as the way in and the longer you stay on the fringes of society, the harder it becomes to bridge those gaps.” To read more, see the link in the next tweet.

We all have that one friend who says they have a book in them. Mine was eventually arrested in Waterstones.

Top tip 🤓👌🏻

Pavement poppies

My sibling and I both had supernatural experiences this week.

Pedro as soon as the throw that usually covers the chair goes in the washing machine

Just opening this morning in the sun

It's taller than me

The Magician's Song

I have a Reform member neighbour and a Moroccan neighbour. Any noise during the night and I'll go full Falling Down.

I also like lizards. One day, Scotland may be warm enough to sustain more lizards.

Having a paloma. Because I like palomas