tweet like nobody’s watching
Joined January 2009
- Tweets 29,632
- Following 495
- Followers 617
- Likes 28,762
1,399 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
6 Jul 2014
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★* Justice Alito *★
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1 Jan 2020
Was gonna think about the best things of the decade but christ I've been on Twitter the whole time and that's so depressing to think about
toynbee tyler retweeted
31 Dec 2019
Old lady: "There's been no one for so long. What is your name?"
Rey: "Rey."
Old lady: "Rey who?"
Rey: "Rey... Smuckles"
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31 Dec 2019
It seems Hollywood will stop at nothing to inject their agenda into classic conservative works. now they've made Little Women FEMINIST!?!
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31 Dec 2019
Twitter is a great platform to workshop new material because it will let you know who is too sensitive to get your unique and edgy brand of humor so you can ignore them and never be uncomfortable
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30 Dec 2019
Which switch game should I get (never played any of these)
50%
Mario odyssey
50%
Pokemon sword or shield
0%
Witcher 3
0%
Dark souls
2 votes • Final results
29 Dec 2019
I'm introducing my kids to star wars movies after they've already consumed more non-movie star wars media than I ever have. We're starting with Episode 1
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29 Dec 2019
Theory: anakin didn't actually make c-3po, he just found a Droid in watto's shop that was being scrapped and stole it. This is the only way to explain why a tinkerer slave kid who has no reason to have a stuffy translator Droid would have one.
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29 Dec 2019
Pick a movie
Keep one actor
The rest are replaced by F Murray Abraham
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27 Dec 2019
my family keeps telling me to calm down but I am resolute in demanding no one can leave the table until everyone admits the strange planet comics are millennial Ziggy
25 Dec 2019
Polar Express is on TV and it still looks like an After Dark screen saver for Windows 95
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23 Dec 2019
My parent's home options are the general store, which is also an event space, gas station, barber, and taxidermist
And the mechanics shop, which also has a short order cook
Neither are open after 3 pm or on weekends
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22 Dec 2019
Harry Potter had a black and white worldview where he was the most important person in the universe, and everyone he cared about enabled him.
And he went to a religious boarding school and it was the most important thing in his life.
He's wizard Boris johnson
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22 Dec 2019
I generally believe that anyone for whom high school was the best time of their life is living in a bubble of fear and insecurity and somehow this describes all of upper middle class England
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