ALT One time I went into a JoAnn Fabrics Store and after walking around for a while feeling like something was weird I suddenly realized they were playing the Halloween theme over the loud speakers. Jamie Lee Curtis in this is not quite fully formed as the incredibly celebrated and prolific actress she will go on to be, but already she is clearly on another level compared to her peers in this movie and similar contemporary American teenager targeted horror movies primarily initially intended to let teens see some boobs and get spooked. Her performance and delivery is so much more textured than the not incompetent, but clearly affected performances all the young conventionally attractive actresses have in all these 70s to mid 80s B-ish movies. Similarly the craft of the movie is something special. I'm not crazy blown away cause this is so early in the slasher genre that the kills are super impressive, but the starkness, tone, and music are excellent and evocative. John Carpenter right awa

ALT This is like a Tom and Jerry cartoon but with gore. Like bit where girl is sawed in half up to her sternum and is still conscious and freaking out is looney tunes shit. The little drag sequence is just a much more violent version of Bugs Bunny's crossdressing shtick. And whipping out that gun is a straight up gag. Weird how the first 40 minutes of this has the arc of a regular slasher where the first main girl gets chased, caught, and has a climactic confrontation with the killer, but then she gets killed and the movie keeps going. Art the Clown is really acted though, great physical performance. I get why he's quickly become a horror icon. Although isn't he maybe more of a mime cause he's in black and white and doesn't talk? I dunno if I'm bought in enough to sit through the rest of these unless i had a friend that was big into these movies. Also it's wild that this movie didnt actually have anything to do with the 2016 killer clown panic despite hitting the film festival circuit in o

ALT "Maybe he suddenly just wanted to die. I get that way sometimes." Me too dawg. Love a slowly unfolding terrible haunting image. Love an artifact of a mundane and familiar technological limitation being the intermediary of horror, both obscuring and heightening it. Love an inexplicable supernatural compulsion to pursue your own annihilation. Love the dumbest boy in the whole world saying the exact wrong thing in every case making you wanna kill yourself

ALT Having a tumblr would have saved Carrie White. Or made her worse. It sure woulda done something.

ALT This movie dumb as hell. Ghost made a website and couldn't even get the right domain. Baffling choice to have both an alive killer and a ghost killer doing separate kills but they use the same website but I guess the alive killer doesn't know his websites haunted and I guess him logging on to upload his snuff videos doesn't count for getting ghost killed. Also if everyone that goes on fear dot com dot com dies and he's got subscribers in the 100s (lmao those numbers) 1. Wouldn't all those people be dying 2. Does that mean all his subs are new viewers every time? It's stupid, I hate when a movie makes me think about plot holes. There are some brief flashes of cool silent hillian visual style but most of the time the movie is either doing dumbass camera movements, doing a dumbass effects that don't look good, or it's to dark to see shit. It's embarrassing that it took america until the 2010s to get half way decent horror about the internet.

ALT "When I masturbate I see birds and lights and stuff and my room gets trashed." Bro on some next level gooning fr. For a goofball tiddy anime about a guy that explodes into lizards and tentacles every time he gets horny there are so many charming little set dressing details. Like how the monster guy is concerned about his wardrobe budget cause he keeps exploding all of his clothes, or how the buff sister has a wimpy little manlet boyfriend (love their love) who doesn't do anything except gets scared, or all the pulp genre literature references, or all the weirdly well considered logistical stuff. Like I dunno that there needed to be an explanation for stuff like why the biker gang has accesses to an abandoned building or the main girl is a small business owner for the phone sex hotline, but it all does so much for making this stand out from the infinite morass of japanese bubble economy OVAs.

ALT "When I masturbate I see birds and lights and stuff and my room gets trashed." Bro on some next level gooning fr. For a goofball tiddy anime about a guy that explodes into lizards and tentacles every time he gets horny there are so many charming little set dressing details. Like how the monster guy is concerned about his wardrobe budget cause he keeps exploding all of his clothes, or how the buff sister has a wimpy little manlet boyfriend (love their love) who doesn't do anything except gets scared, or all the pulp genre literature references, or all the weirdly well considered logistical stuff. Like I dunno that there needed to be an explanation for stuff like why the biker gang has accesses to an abandoned building or the main girl is a small business owner for the phone sex hotline, but it all does so much for making this stand out from the infinite morass of japanese bubble economy OVAs.

ALT There's bit right at the start of the scene where renfield is in the hospital and the orderly is throwing away his spiders and flies and shit where some background patient delivers a bit of expository dialogue about renfield but the line read is so loud and shrill it sounds like that Simpsons bit where the red hot chili peppers are there and flea is clipping the mic cause he was for real screaming from the other side of the recording booth. Dracula's castle in this is insane. Why's he got a little coffin for a bug. There's opossums and armadillos hanging out and they don't have those in eastern europe. Like outside of the fiction it's cause this is a hollywood production and they sent out some poor production assistant out in the California wilderness to grab animals, but what's the in universe explanation? Is dracula importing armadillos? This is one of those movies that's such a classic that it becomes hard to talk about. Bela Lugosi is really spectacular in this

ALT There's bit right at the start of the scene where renfield is in the hospital and the orderly is throwing away his spiders and flies and shit where some background patient delivers a bit of expository dialogue about renfield but the line read is so loud and shrill it sounds like that Simpsons bit where the red hot chili peppers are there and flea is clipping the mic cause he was for real screaming from the other side of the recording booth. Dracula's castle in this is insane. Why's he got a little coffin for a bug. There's opossums and armadillos hanging out and they don't have those in eastern europe. Like outside of the fiction it's cause this is a hollywood production and they sent out some poor production assistant out in the California wilderness to grab animals, but what's the in universe explanation? Is dracula importing armadillos? This is one of those movies that's such a classic that it becomes hard to talk about. Bela Lugosi is really spectacular in this, but the stuff goi

ALT Great visuals and fantastic vibes. Every visual effect that isn't the bat puppet looks great, but also the bat is so goofy that rules every time it shows up and they play that stupid bird caw. This movie lifts so much so directly from the universal dracula series but it's early and culturally distinctive enough that it feels more like it's playing with the same tropes rather than ripping them off. Like of course the vampire movie has a real estate subplot, of course there's a twist where the protagonists read the vampire's name backwards in a mirror. Although there is an undercurrent of labor politics going on that doesn't real pay off in any meaningful way, but it's pretty unique that it's there. Ending is an all timer though. The balls it takes to end your vampire movie with a Tom and Eric ass joke where your lead is saying some presumably heartfelt shit that cannot be heard at all over a really loud train whistle that goes on for a really long time.

ALT Listen I know the Art the Clown make up is literally mostly white face paint, but every time I look at him it feels like it's racist. It reads like white paint over blackface to me. That aside, from this movie alone, I'm not sure if I "get" the hype that has turned Art and Damien Leone into modern horror icons. Art is definitely a striking design, but like aside from the violence against women and the vhs thing his bit is kinda vague, and the movie as a whole is just kinda fine. The frame story isn't super well acted, kinda weirdly in contrast to supposedly fictional shorts, and I think it's cheating to to use that much night of the living dead footage to set your tone. Make your own goddam movie.

ALT The first short I think is my favorite. It's kinda nonsensical in it's incidence, but as a style piece that moves between a bunch of horror tropes, like from lone costumed slasher to abduction death trap torture porn to a demonic cult thing, is pretty neat. I also like the aesthetics going on in this one the best and the Art gag right at the beginning are real good. The second doing alien as home invasion is kinda interesting but the costume looks like something out of a doctor who parody. The third is perfectly serviceable slasher gore, but like not all that much else going on, and I hate the fucking filters over the whole thing. I do really like the final gore reveal. Tbh all the shorts have a pretty great punchline at the end. Just gotta see what's going on with Terrifier proper. Also what the hell is up with kids carving pumpkins after getting home from trick or treating? Both this and trick r treat had that as a thing and it seems pointless.

ALT Shenanigans ass movie. I dunno the last time I saw a monster movie where the characters are so constantly getting up to silly little activities, like pole vaulting or pogo sticking or playing rock paper scissors or doing little pranks. It goes a long to making the big ass cast of weirdos really likeable and making the difference between a dumb movie that kinda sucks, like a Maximum Overdrive, and a dumb movie that rules like this one. Love of a grabboid. Excellent rubber monster. It's very funny how small they are in the era of the modern Dune movies putting the biggest goddamn worms you've ever seen on screen. Also what was up with movies in the late 80s/early 90s about two dudes that are boyfriends and then one of them gets a girlfriend?

ALT Dan Harmon is a fucking hack. You can't make a joke about why don't characters in horror movies just sit in the middle of a room holding knives out with their backs to each other when a movie from 1982 had that exactly. Kind of a weirdly slow movie where even when the kills start coming towards the end of of the second half it's just kinda fine until like in the final third the movie locks in and starts pulling some really great visual gags. Like every one loves to bring up the pizza on the dead body, but the pizza itself obviously being a greasy cold stiff piece of crap is so good. The amount of times they tease the girl in the fridge bit before the punch line delivery is choice, and the whole basement sequence was excellent, i really thought that girl was just gonna get herself with the corded saw. The killer himself is such a nothingburger of a guy, though. I get how it fits into the movie's weird originally-a-parody sensibilities, but like he's got no visual design to him