(RETIRED)

Joined January 2013
584 Photos and videos
🚨 BREAKING: MUELLER NEWS 🚨 Only joking, but for real, the Florida Legislature is trying to disenfranchise voters with some bullshit shenanigans. Sign this petition to prove you’re cool and I’ll follow you out of solidarity. change.org/p/florida-legisla…
I’ve seen some truly insane things come out of Florida over the last few years, but I don’t think anything has shocked me more than what the state legislature is currently trying to do to the voting rights of ex-felons. slate.com/news-and-politics/…
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I’ve seen some truly insane things come out of Florida over the last few years, but I don’t think anything has shocked me more than what the state legislature is currently trying to do to the voting rights of ex-felons. slate.com/news-and-politics/…
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For real, I currently only follow Jimmy Buffett, but I'm willing to let that insanely funny bit die for this cause, because it clearly deserves more attention.
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Okay, earnest tweets over. I promise I'll tweet something funny again soon.
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he comin’
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Florida Man Fire Bombs Garage That Impounded His Car, Hits His Own Vehicle wftv.com/news/local/man-thro…
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(via @Kato305)
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Florida Man Accused of Masturbating in Front of Children Says He Was Just Adjusting His Hernia wric.com/news/national/flori…
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Florida Man retweeted
Florida Man Steals $33,000 Worth of Rare Coins, Cashes Them in CoinStar Machine for $29.30 palmbeachpost.com/news/20190…
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Hell yeah, now we’re talking.
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Uh-oh, I think I know where this is going. *clicks on article* Well that wasn’t what I was expecting. Touchè, Florida.
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