In absolute terms, I am the most persecuted man of all times, in the whole history of mankind, worldwide.
Joined June 2018
- Tweets 2,183
- Following 32
- Followers 4,848
- Likes 7,901
542 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
1 Nov 2025
NEW VIDEO:
14th April 1912 was quiet Sunday night in the busy North Atlantic shipping lanes, until the world's largest ship began transmitting a distress call.
Lïnk in reply
3
3
57
7,876
Jun 11
sleepin at a friends house got the mfin elmer blankets lets gooooooo
7
234
Jun 6
Woke Doctor Who doesn't call it the Sonic screwdriver anymore because that's offensive to autistic people.
1
9
514
May 27
got jumpscared by a non-AI answer on Google today. just like old times.
2
2
41
788
May 26
British people trying to explain heat and humidity to the world as if places like Florida, India, and Singapore don’t exist.
96
3,026
36,777
1,717,724
May 23
left wing drugs:
weed
LSD
xanax
right wing drugs:
meth
cocaine
zyns
We need centrist drugs for radical centrists.
1,233
1,122
28,932
1,179,519
Michael retweeted
May 13
How’s the Pope got nearly 18m followers. He’s not even that funny
2
6
37
3,430
May 19
Say what you like about the UK's freedom of speech problems but at the very least, insulting a politician is not illegal, unlike most of Europe.
May 18
A guy jokingly tweeted “olaf scholz you bastard what the hell is this” in frustration because Fortnite was stuck at 3% download. As a result, German authorities investigated him for committing a criminal offence (insulting a politician, §188 StGB) and forced him to delete it.
25
37
717
36,578
May 16
The shortest man I know (5'5) got engaged today.
Don't believe the lie that women only care about height. It's never over.
1
2
12
851
May 16
Whether you are left wing or right wing, we can all come together and agree The Rainbow Fish is a dogshit book that promotes socialism and/or anti-LGBT bigotry.
3
12
755
Michael retweeted
May 10
You've got the wrong Ian Watkins mate
It's that what's made me smile
You've just called the bloke from Steps a twisted paedophile
32
441
5,055
256,954
May 9
I thought this guy was supposed to be locked in a cave as punishment for plagiarism or something idk didn't watch the video
22
437
15,115
600,381
May 9
If you're not fat then you're not American. It's as simple as that.
2
14
886
May 8
It took me 6 years but I have now watched them all. @edgarwright
27 Jul 2016
So. Here's a list on @mubi of my 1000 favourite films. Enjoy.
mubi.com/lists/edgar-wrights… (Huge thanks to @Thebanjohype for helping with this)
5
11
1,737
197,368
May 7
Rotherham 2040 Olympics, make it happen @RMBCPress
🚨🇬🇧 NEW: The UK is considering a bid for the Olympic Games in the 2040s
The Department of Culture wants to make the UK “the go to place for international sports”
Other major events planned/scheduled include:
🏅Commonwealth Games 2026
🏏 Women’s T20 World Cup 2026
⚽️ EURO 2028
⛳️ Sondheim Cup 2030 (POTENTIAL)
⚽️ Women’s World Cup 2035
⛳️ Ryder Cup 2035 (BID)
1
5
1,422
Apr 28
I have left a secret note on page 75 of this decorative book in this display in the Ikea in Wembley, London.
51°33'12.3"N 0°15'38.3"W
5
2
27
1,666
Apr 24
5:15pm, sitting outside a pub in glorious sunshine and warm weather after work. And to think, if we were still on Standard Time (like the loony anti-Daylight Saving folks want us to be), we'd still be slaving away in the office right now!
11
983
Apr 7
Nobody will tell you this but GTA6 is already out but only for prison Xboxes. Prisoners worldwide are playing GTA6 and you're not.
1
2
21
1,231
Michael retweeted
Mar 25
in a world where we are on our phones 4 hours a day, no one is actually “bad at texting"
they just don’t like you enough.
25
14
260
10,438
Apr 3
Parallel timeline where the Netherlands conquered most of the world making Dutch the lingua franca instead.
10
133
2,874
45,867