Take 2 minutes to read this thread.
What I'm about to describe is one of the most powerful forces that drives human behavior. In every negotiation, every relationship, every transaction.
It's not trust. It's not reputation. It's not interest.
In 1985, one of the poorest countries on earth ravaged by famine, people dying in the streets sent money to help another country hit by a disaster.
The reason why will change how you see every interaction you have.
2 : 1985. Ethiopia.
The country is in the middle of one of the worst famines in modern history. Hundreds of thousands of people are dying. International aid is pouring in from everywhere just to keep the population alive.
Ethiopia has nothing. Less than nothing.
3 : That same year, Mexico is hit by a devastating earthquake.
Thousands dead. Entire neighborhoods destroyed. The country is in crisis.
And then something happens that nobody saw coming.
4 : Ethiopia sends $5000 to Mexico.
A country that can barely feed its own people. A country surviving on foreign aid. A country with no money to spare.
Sends money to Mexico.
Researchers who documented this couldn't believe it. Why would a starving nation give to another nation?
5 : The answer goes back 50 years.
In 1935, Italy invaded Ethiopia. The country was under attack, isolated, desperate for support.
Mexico and almost no other nation publicly stood up for Ethiopia on the world stage.
One act of solidarity. 50 years earlier.
6 : Ethiopia never forgot.
Half a century later, with its people dying of hunger, when Mexico needed help, Ethiopia found a way to give back.
Not because it made strategic sense. Not because anyone asked. Not because they could afford it.
Because they felt they had to.
7 : Cialdini documented this story in Influence.
He calls it reciprocity. One of the oldest and most deeply wired rules of human behavior.
When someone does something for you, something happens inside you that has nothing to do with logic. You feel obligated to give back. Not because you chose to. Because you're built that way.
It works across individuals, companies, and apparently entire nations across 50 years.
8 : Think about what this means in every relationship you have.
The favor you did for someone 2 years ago that you forgot about. They didn't.
The introduction you made that cost you nothing. The advice you gave for free. The time you showed up when nobody else did.
Every single one of those moments created an obligation in someone else's mind. Whether they admit it or not.
9 : The people who are best at getting others to move for them aren't the most talented or the most visible.
They're the ones who gave first. Consistently. Without keeping score.
Reciprocity doesn't care about logic. It doesn't care about timing. It doesn't care about how much you can afford to give.
It only cares about who gave first.
10 : Ethiopia had nothing.
And still gave.
50 years later.
If a starving nation can feel that pull, imagine what a single genuine act of generosity does in a room with someone who can change your trajectory.
Give first. Always.