Now: Co-founder @hellopatient | Previously: Led consumer and growth product @carbonhealth | Hobbies include getting fired constantly | Mostly satire

Joined April 2012
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Excited to share that we've raised a $22.5m Series A for Hello Patient, led by Scale Venture Partners. This is by far the worst announcement video I've ever made. I can't believe our lead investor agreed to this
Our lead investor and I have a big announcement to share. Thursday, 9AM PT.
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OpenAI should drop GPT-6 this weekend. Would be elite timing
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This is art
USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving. Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free. I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these." "They just come with the table, man." They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner. This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat. I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared. "Did we…?" "Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless." Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined. My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude." Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man. I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy. Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived. I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most. Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.
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Elon after achieving trillionaire status
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@grok make the bottle the shape of a rocket ship
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Newest marketplace find 👌
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Might keep my Fitbit Air just to track my 5 years old sleeping patterns. I finally learned why I’m exhausted every day. He wakes up 2-3 times a night and gets up before 5 and then wakes me up 😭
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Just gave our whole product team unrestricted access to Fable
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Wonder how hard it is nowadays to throw the SDK documentation of one of these Chinese trackers at Claude or Codex and have it build a functional iOS app 🤔
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When I was at Carbon Health, my team was responsible for the software side of this wearable we shipped. It was a pretty dumb device that basically just tracked steps but you could program the buttons to log things in the app. Chinese SDK documentation was awful though. Probably 100x easier to ship something today
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We're hiring a Head of Product at Hello Patient! We've waited more than two years to hire a formal product role and now that we are almost a team of 50, it's time. This is a rare senior IC product role where you'll report up to me and oversee product strategy and ship product. You'll own the roadmap across multiple eng pods, live in customer workflows, work with our agent PMs, write PRDs, and use AI to build alongside the team. Looking for: * 5 years of experience with a deep technical background * Based in Austin or NYC (we'll pay for relocation) * Healthcare experience IMO the best product job in healthcare AI right now. My DMs are open. Full JD and application here: jobs.ashbyhq.com/hellopatien…
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I've now tried like 5 fitness wearables and my current opinion is that an Apple Watch for workouts and daily wear Oura for sleep and recovery is the elite combo. Going to try an Apple Watch Ultra to see how big of a difference the extra battery life makes
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Nothing humbles you more than learning that every workout machine at Lifetime Fitness costs at least $20k each
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Never deleting this app
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Whoop vs Fitbit Air strength training tracking this morning: - Fitbit Air claims I burned 474 calories (lol) - Whoop likely much more accurate at 215 calories burned - 8 bpm different in average HR during workout - Whoop seemed to track the HR spikes better - Whoop is much better at visualizing intensity of workout - Couldn’t track Oura as I can’t lift with a ring on!
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Results are back screenshots in thread. Here's my ranking of top sleep trackers based on last night's reporting: 1. Oura 2. Whoop 3. Eight Sleep 4. Apple Watch 5. Fitbit Air
Going to sleep tonight with an Oura, Fitbit Air, Apple Watch, and Whoop on my Eight Sleep. I will report back with sleep stats tomorrow morning
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I probably will not do this again. Interesting data but incredibly uncomfortable to wear 3 bands to bed!
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Tracking workouts and steps data today across Oura, Whoop, and Fitbit and will report back
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