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jam/jine doe (recently revived) @audaciousapple
Joined June 2014
  • Tweets 3,740
  • Following 0
  • Followers 193
222 Photos and videos
I think my sister is entitled to government compensation for having to put up with me
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This just in: the grossest person you know passed their food safety certification!
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jam/jine doe (recently revived) retweeted
Drewberz@buddy_ferrara
13 Nov 2022
no thoughts, just crab rangoon taco
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The masculine urge to let my hair grow out and do absolutely nothing with it
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The first draft of my book took me a year, the second draft took six months. At this rate the next draft will take three months, then six weeks, then three weeks, then 10 days, 5 days, and on and on
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jam/jine doe (recently revived) retweeted
jubby@jemainesclement
9 Nov 2022
i think laszlo would respect my they/them pronouns but he would call me They like it's my name
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Moon is in Taurus AND there was a lunar eclipse on that same full moon??? No wonder I'm thriving my sky best friend is looking out for me bless her 💖
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I am s e v e n chapters away from this draft being finished I'm eating my furniture I'm jumping in the lake I'm throwing my bedding out the window
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Should never have moved out the nearest Arby's is 3.6 miles away and now I'm vehicle-less this SUCKS
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Sorry I can't hang out today, I promised myself I'd walk into the woods and scream. Yeah, it's gonna be all day. No yeah, I'll probably fall to my knees and claw at the mud a bit so I'll need a shower, and then it'll be too late to go out. Call me next week!
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A lot of people think the scariest part of The Blair Witch Project is the witch but that's actually just a common misconception! The scariest part of that movie is the film students
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Not only did I apparently apply for a teaching job in NYC by some strange accident, but it seems the teacher shortage is so dire that they actually wanted to interview me
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I'm starting to get 3 am despair in the middle of the afternoon not sure what symptom this is
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Been taking my antibiotics and my probiotics at the same time and softly chanting "fight, fight, fight"
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Having my teeth pulled out is really putting a damper on my ability to bite anyone and everyone at the slightest provocation and that's kind of a core part of my personality tbh
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Drugs are bad I took my prescribed opioid last night and had a dream I was a warrior cat plotting a coup
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What kind of world do we live in where surgeons won't give back the teeth they removed this is an outrage
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jam/jine doe (recently revived) retweeted
matt bernstein@mattxiv
3 Oct 2022
doing some maths
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I love telling doctors something a different doctor said cause they're always like "that's fucking stupid he sounds like an idiot" and I'm like great. Net zero information for me here
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Why is it that if you show up early to a medical appointment you have to wait a minimum of 20 extra minutes but if you show up so much as 90 seconds late they take you out back and shoot you on the spot
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How do I put on a resume "I know I have a year long employment gap but I can spend thirteen hours on my feet dealing with the dumbest people in the world without violating the Geneva convention and that has to count for something"
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