RETWEET if you are celebrating Barack Obama Appreciation Day today!

Shout out to @CrackerBarrel in Ridley PA for making me my own version of the hashbrown casserole without the onions. It was uncommonly kind. Weird food allergies stink and they went above and beyond.

Things most Americans agree on: Groceries cost too much. Tariffs suck and make no sense. Congress and Presidents shouldn’t trade stocks. The debt is a mess. The border should be secure, but legal immigration is good. Endless wars are stupid, especially ones that nobody wants and have never been explained. Americans are exhausted. AI is like my new best friend that also might be trying to take my job, my ability to think for myself, and my humanity in the process. Yo like I love you, but WTF, but I still love you. Diversity is actually awesome! The opposite is boring AF. Canadians are super fucking cool. Mexicans are chill. Putin isn’t a good guy looking out for America’s best interest. Rocky IV and Miracle are great movies. Good neighbors are a blessing. Freedom of religion and coexistence without having to blow each other up is probably a good idea. We all question, are we alone in the universe? We all fuck up along the way. Epstein didn’t hang himself. The Trumps and Epstein were best friends for decades. It’s like Bert trying to tell us Ernie was just an acquaintance in the same social scene on Sesame Street back in the day. The Cowboys suck. Go Birds! Things we’re told to fight about: Me. Laptop. Vaccines. Transgenders in sports. Pronouns. That’s the joke.

My mother is battling dementia. She has one joy in life and its @ExtraGum . She goes through 70 pieces every 3/4 days. She can hardly remember me, but knows it has to be Extra Gum Polar Ice or Spearmint.

Trump wants Jimmy Kimmel fired for a joke. I want Trump fired for rape, abuse, fraud, theft, corruption, and a derelict of duty. Thumbs up 👍🏻 if you agree.

RETWEET if you stand with Jimmy Kimmel against Donald Trump!

God does not bless any conflict. Anyone who is a disciple of Christ, the Prince of Peace, is never on the side of those who once wielded the sword and today drop bombs. Military action will not create space for freedom or times of #Peace, which comes only from the patient promotion of coexistence and dialogue among peoples.

THAT'S NUMBER 54!

This is Craig Erwich, the President of ABC Entertainment. He has the power to put Jimmy Kimmel back on air. RETWEET to demand @ABC reinstate Jimmy Kimmel!

First they came for Stephen Colbert. Now they are coming for Jimmy Kimmel. If you think it'll stop here, you are fooling yourself. RETWEET if you stand with Kimmel and Colbert!

RETWEET if you stand with Jimmy Kimmel!

Raise your hand if you think Donald Trump does NOT belong in the White House! 🖐️ I want everyone to follow you! 💙🌊 Drop a 💙 Repost 🔄 You will get MORE FOLLOWERS 💯

TRUMP JUST FLED THE PODIUM WITH PUTIN — NO QUESTIONS, NOTHING! TOTAL LOW ENERGY. THE MAN LOOKED LIKE HE’D JUST EATEN 3 BUCKETS OF KFC WITH VLAD. IS HE AFRAID THE PRESS WILL ASK ABOUT ME??? (AMERICA’S FAVORITE GOVERNOR) AND THE FACT I "STOLE THE CAMERAS" THIS WEEK WITH “THE MAPS”? MANY PEOPLE ARE SAYING HE BEGGED PUTIN TO HOLD HIS HANDS (TINY) ON THE WAY OUT. ADMIT IT, DONNIE J… YOU’RE TERRIFIED BECAUSE THIS WAS THE WORST WEEK OF YOUR LIFE BECAUSE OF ME, GAVIN C. NEWSOM. “THE MAPS” WILL END YOUR PRESIDENCY, RETAKE CONGRESS FOR THE PEOPLE, AND EXPOSE YOUR RIGGED "LITTLE GAME." MY "PERFECT MAPS" ARE MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN ANYTHING IN TRUMP TOWER (WHICH MANY SAY SMELLS WEIRD). @STEVENCHUENG47 — EXPLAIN THIS DISASTER!!! ENJOY YOUR FLIGHT HOME, DONALD — YOU’RE PUTIN’S PROBLEM NOW. I’M AMERICA’S SOLUTION. — GCN

DONALD IS FINISHED — HE IS NO LONGER “HOT.” FIRST THE HANDS (SO TINY) AND NOW ME — GAVIN C. NEWSOM — HAVE TAKEN AWAY HIS “STEP.” MANY ARE SAYING HE CAN’T EVEN DO THE “BIG STAIRS” ON AIR FORCE ONE ANYMORE — USES THE LITTLE BABY STAIRS NOW. SAD! TOMORROW HE’S GOT HIS “MEETING” WITH PUTIN IN “RUSSIA.” NOBODY CARES. ALL THE TELEVISION CAMERAS ARE ON ME, AMERICA’S FAVORITE GOVERNOR. EVEN LOW-RATINGS LAURA INGRAM (EDITS THE TAPES!) CAN’T STOP TALKING ABOUT MY BEAUTIFUL MAPS. YOU’RE WELCOME FOR LIBERATION DAY, AMERICA! DONNIE J MISSED “THE DEADLINE” (WHOOPS!) AND NOW I RUN THE SHOW. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER! — GCN

We all know 'He' is a FRAUD‼️ The election results need to be investigated. Please listen to this, then LIKE & RETWEET.

BREAKING: In a stunning moment, Lindsey Graham just blamed Donald Trump for the border security legislation not passing. Retweet so all Americans see this and know Donald Trump is to blame for any border security related problems.

Federal authorities in Philadelphia have seized more than 30 internet domains believed to be part of a wide-ranging, Russian-backed disinformation campaign aimed at influencing the outcome of the U.S. presidential election. inquirer.com/politics/electi…

Hold the fuck on — Donald Trump told the assembled media a harrowing story about nearly crashing in a helicopter with Willie Brown, during which the former Mayor allegedly disparaged his ex-girlfriend Kamala Harris, and now we’ve come to find out that he didn’t nearly crash at all, he was actually with Jerry Brown not Willie Brown, Kamala never even came up, and the closest they came to crashing was every time Trump worried aloud about the possibility? And a single bad debate was campaign ending? Are you fucking kidding me?

BREAKING: New CBS polling shows Vice President Kamala Harris leading Donald Trump, including in key swing states. This is huge.