45 year old white suburban man contemplating divorce and suicide daily
Joined April 2020
- Tweets 43
- Following 14
- Followers 10
- Likes 103
1 Photos and videos
23 Jan 2024
*employee hands me my whopper and crown*
“Say the fucking line faggot”
*tears begin to stream down the 16 year old employee who is depressed and forgot to take their Prozac*
“You rule”
God I love this great country!!
22 Jan 2024
Burger King workers now have to give you a crown and say "you rule," per Bloomberg.
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13 Jan 2024
Finally
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1 Jan 2024
Going to ask my ex girlfriend to stomp on my balls and call me a faggot when the ball drops. There’s levels to this.
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2 Nov 2023
Walked down a Hen House aisle just now so I could smell a milf
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26 May 2022
Girls will really switch 4 lanes last second to make the turn nearly causing a 10 car pile up with a smile on their face
30 Apr 2022
Life is like a game of billiards. Just need to make shots. Haven’t been making any lately and the first shot I made was the 8 ball. Game over. Pack it in. Time to go home
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18 Apr 2022
Grandpa just gave me some truly incredible and thoughtful advice: if she breaks your heart break her jaw
11 Apr 2022
Some bitch and her pussy is living in my mind rn. Gotta readjust and realign. MAIN GOAL. 100 McChickens eaten by the end of the week.
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11 Apr 2022
Okay now that’s pretty fucking funny🤣🤣 good on China
11 Apr 2022
Just spoke to President Xi. The people screaming in the buildings were joking and making a YouTube video. It’s funny and I feel better.
1 Apr 2022
56 year old female co worker is complaining about Cirilla’s raising prices. It is truly disgusting how inflation is negatively effecting the people of my community and this beautiful country
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6 Aug 2021
Just saw a family of 6 on the plane with shirts that say “vacay mode”. So like where are the applications to join that family?😂🤣😆🤷♂️
cryingcorn retweeted
5 Jul 2021
mosquitoes are just suckin on ur girl’s thighs rn
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cryingcorn retweeted
4 Jul 2021
Why the fuck is it called the restroom I am fighting for my life in here
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4 Jul 2021
“Happy Fourth of July” yeah that’s all I need to know. Thanks for letting me know you are a racist pig
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15 Apr 2021
Been trying to find something like this for decades. Balls in her court.
14 Apr 2021
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