scattered thinking but online
Joined July 2019
- Tweets 445
- Following 15
- Followers 17
- Likes 379
14 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
13 Feb 2021
dont talk to me unless you have stretch marks
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8 Dec 2021
Sorry babe but the rubber boots stay on during watersports
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25 Nov 2021
I've got a laundry list of idiotic things I've done in my life and starting smoking tops the list
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22 Nov 2021
3 weeks sober. I have become the function of time. The world stops spinning upon my command. I can walk thru solid matter and have begun developing amphibious and avian qualities.
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22 Nov 2021
News junkie suckin dick in an alley for a couple pages of the Toronto Sun
human.database retweeted
21 Nov 2021
tinder bio: my parents think that I can change for the right person
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10 Nov 2021
Crowdfunding a Super Size Me type documentary where I get a vaccine a day for a month straight just to see what fuckin happens
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8 Nov 2021
Thank god for daylight savings time otherwise I'd have to take accountability for all my self-created problems
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7 Nov 2021
RIP my old mattress. I feel truly honoured for every stain left from freebleeding and squirting. I cherish my friends, lovers and partners for everything imprinted upon the canvas of many great slumbers and memories.
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human.database retweeted
12 Oct 2021
Gimme my Coffee Time and no one gets hurt
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9 Oct 2021
The 2020's version of a husband leaving his family to "get a pack of smokes" is "honey, I'm going to get some oat milk I'll be back soon"
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human.database retweeted
29 Sep 2021
taking capocollo to the Sopranos film ripping it up and mixing it around in the pop corn M&Ms style, this is what Jim would have wanted
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