parody account 🇲🇽 🇺🇸
Joined December 2023
- Tweets 10,148
- Following 890
- Followers 1,329
- Likes 17,860
669 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
An interdimensional being told me that humans were the most evil species they had ever come across.
Upon receiving this information, they turned me into a chimpanzee and left me with a keyboard.
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customer told me he almost died in a motorcycle accident and I go “God bless you’re still here so I can make money off you”
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you’re leaving? but our slow burn stockholm syndrome romance hasn’t even started yet
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why is everything a disorder maybe I’m just mexican
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they’ll put a data center up yo ass if you not paying attention
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if my girl not happy with the establishment I’m killing everyone Tony Montana style
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all these new stupid instagram influencers coming in are posting my lowkey food spots and it’s making me homicidal
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sometimes you gotta give the tweet a little faith
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another shift at the everything goes wrong factory tomorrow
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