send me something nice
Joined November 2014
- Tweets 7,186
- Following 380
- Followers 10,995
- Likes 37,046
687 Photos and videos
Jun 11
chipotle offers to “finish you off” when you go to check out now. life keeps changing
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Jun 7
i drove by my office tonight for a laugh and all my coworkers were inside looking at me
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Jun 4
nice little 0 liker to start the morning
Jun 4
wait lets buffer - computers
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Jun 1
i hate when my upstairs neighbor walks around. i hope he falls through the soft spot in the ceiling ive been spraying with water every night.
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May 25
it can be quite difficult to shop for furniture when u do not want to be alive
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paddle retweeted
28 Nov 2021
{on a first date}
him: so what’s your dream job
me: uhhhmm.....in my dreams i am usually tiny and some sort of snail janitor. and i have to go around and mop up all the snail slime 😅
him: no, i meant like if you could have any job in the world
me: what did i just say 🤨
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May 21
for dinner tonight im having a carrot and for my leisure activity im leaving all of the lights on in my apartment
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May 15
a little confused why everybody is a terrible person now but i guess thats life
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Apr 29
tweeted and it flopped.. 1000 people unfollowed, angry dms, screaming i can hear from my bedroom. i guess thats just my life in this crazy ass world
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Apr 26
the humiliation that must have occurred for this to find its way to Goodwill…
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Apr 22
first time using a heated blanket. amazingggggg. i can feel the wires inside they are heating up! i need to get them out.
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