Love is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. πππ
Joined November 2025
- Tweets 205
- Following 197
- Followers 24
- Likes 159
25 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
5 Nov 2025
I once gave a guy an autism test after we had sex. I hope to find that again someday.
4 Nov 2025
Being weird together is a love language idc
2
11
605
Thinking about the time I spent the night at South of the Border and came home with Giardia.
21
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
May 10
Sex is good, but have you ever had a man look at you like youβre his entire world? Elite.
8
18
60
919
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Mar 16
& for the lady, perhaps a day off?
104
25,543
80,353
1,329,642
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Mar 14
That Florida man said he was kidnapped by dolphins to build an underwater city and I believe him.
95
768
5,467
197,800
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Mar 3
I have a better chance of seeing a dinosaur than ever seeing myself in a relationship at this point.
22
887
4,875
72,592
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Feb 28
if they nuke us can they make sure to do it in the morning i donβt wanna work all fucking day just to come home and get nuked
253
7,422
103,113
2,618,117
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Feb 21
When you realize the only single people left in your family are you and your 7 years old nephew
165
4,033
45,987
985,020
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Feb 8
Fuck a gut feeling, Iβm damn near psychic.
14
46
170
6,851
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Saying βgood gameβ after sex.
22
21
158
2,865
Dating. Something that will keep me humble until the day I die.
2
43
Me when I thought this time was going to be different.
69
I lowered my standards and he still couldnβt reach themπ₯΄
1
2
91
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Jan 26
Guys have you ever been in a workplace where all the original coworkers have left so now youβre in season 5 with all these new characters
758
9,242
129,440
3,403,026
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Jan 22
this weekend whoever you go home with on saturday night
youβre stuck with all weekend
no way out
you will either fall in love or never want to see the person again
the choice is yours
what are you going to do
232
1,011
27,361
1,439,970
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Anyone who asks for proof of my citizenship will instead receive proof of my status as the most devastating downfield blocking wide receiver in Georgia high school football history
285
405
13,278
793,979
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Jan 15
Iβll drink bleach before I post a picture of myself in 2016
12
1,762
10,002
280,479
Can we also take out Canvas again?
Jan 15
god iβve seen what youβve done for verizon and need you to do it for outlook for like six hours
81
ππ£ππ€ππππͺ retweeted
Jan 13
Men be pushing 40 & still treating women bad. Grow up, you're about to pass away.
264
2,489
13,007
317,957