You can’t scam me, I’m broke | @manutd
Joined April 2016
- Tweets 27,838
- Following 251
- Followers 211,988
- Likes 7,173
1,118 Photos and videos
Pinned Tweet
11 Dec 2025
Women are actually the ones who insist on no-condom. Let’s have this tough conversation
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Jun 4
Messi will start his games
Ronaldo will be brought in the last 15 mins
That’s the difference
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Jun 3
These World Cup match times man. I’m not gettin up at 1am to watch Brazil vs Lesotho
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Jun 3
Good thing the economy is tight right now. Got the perfect reason for not buying condoms. Skin to skin, welcome home
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Jun 2
Wait. Which goal?
Jun 1
Guy's, after you've achieved this goal in life, what else do you need to feel completely successful ?? 🤔🏡👨👩👧👦
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Jun 2
There are 17 of them and 4.1 billion men. May the best man win. Goodluck gentlemen
Gents, there are proper ladies out there who were raised in a peaceful loving households
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Jun 1
It’s Monday. Don’t forget to save a life and make fun of atleast 1 fat person.
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May 31
I count just over 100k likes
That’s a hundred thousand souls that just booked their ticket to hell over a useless lie
May 31
mind u she’s better looking than him
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May 31
This how much a pothole cost me
No broke person runs a car, whether extremely cheap or old, the bills bro, the bills that come with running a car.
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May 31
R1.2m for a vivo. SMH madness
May 31
R1 199 900
2017 Volkswagen Golf GTI ClubSport S M/T
1 Owner vehicle that has been kept brand new
Number 396 of 400 limited-edition
2.0L Turbo engine
228kW & 380Nm of torque
(220 km)
this collector's item is truly a rare vehicle to find*
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May 31
Problem with going to the township is, if any of the local girls is feeling you, you’ll get a bottle to the head, knife to the ribs or both from a jealous chap
Other than that, township is cool
May 31
Enjoying my Sunday at a tavern in Tembisa. Beer here is R23 and my budget was R300 .
I”m already at R135 and I have had enough.
Alcohol in Townships is priced reasonably and correct.
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May 31
If you’ve never been to Kampala and you’re a party animal, you’re doing yourself a disservice. They drink and club as if Museveni has it in law
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May 31
Black man stop running away from your responsibilities of raising your children. You don’t need to run away. Just stay in the same town and ignore them
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May 31
Nothing beats dating a girl with a low self esteem. Those are the best. Don’t trust me? Get yourself a fat girl and know peace
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May 30
This is nothing. The proper looting is coming. That’s what a lot of people are banking on.
38 foreigners took the Mayor of Mtshezi to Pietermaritzburg high court and the court granted an interim order that the Inkosi Langalibalele Municipality must allow 38 Ethiopian shop owners in Estcourt, access to their shops to resume doing business. That resulted to looting.
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May 30
*single mom with swollen ankles
You tell a Woman you her soulmate & she dont realise it til she 36 & fat
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May 29
I job hopped 5 times in 5 years
Recruiters would imply that I was “not loyalty and unstable” to which I’d respond “and yet I keep getting hired.. why d’you think that is?”
I earn R143500 pm now
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May 29
But me with a R350 traffic fine gets tackled by german shepherds and SAPS at oshoek border
Breaking news
Warrant issued for Giyani businessman who fled to China ahead of trial
The Polokwane Specialised Commercial Crimes Court has issued a warrant of arrest for Giyani businessman Howard Mashaba after he absconded from trial today, 29 May 2026, reportedly travelling to China on a business trip without the court's permission.
Mashaba, a convicted fraudster with four previous criminal records, faces charges including fraud, theft, three counts of money laundering, and contraventions of the Prevention of Organised Crime Act (POCA). The state alleges he fraudulently concluded property deals involving state-owned land worth between R290,000 and R450,000. The properties were never transferred, and a hotel was unlawfully built on one of them.
The businessman is also under investigation by the Special Investigating Unit (SIU) for allegedly diverting over R34.4 million from the National Lotteries Commission. In February 2026, the Limpopo High Court ordered the forfeiture of his R22 million hotel built on state land.
Mashaba has a history of defying court orders. He remains a fugitive from a 2019 contempt sentence for failing to pay Mercedes-Benz approximately R22 million.
His father, Magezi Ben Mashaba (74), and two other co-accused are expected to appear alongside him when the matter resumes on 29 June 2026 should authorities execute the warrant before then.
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May 29
A cellphone contract for Rashford? Lol they’re not spitting in hit face, they’re spitting in his food
May 28
🚨🚨| NEW: If Barcelona activate Marcus Rashford’s €30m buy option, it will be paid in three instalments of €10m each year - 2026, 2027 and 2028. [@moillorens]
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