software engineer // typescript evangelist // aspiring crossword constructor // unapologetic sports fanatic // i dress like a much taller woman

Joined January 2018
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I want to be “only eats heirloom vegetables” rich.
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I don’t know who needs to hear this but base salary != salary cap.
Tell me you’re a front end engineer without telling me you’re a front end engineer.
If you don’t come out of a design review with 50 tiny css adjustments to make, did you even really have the meeting?
I’ve never opened an email faster.
Jack White still looks like a 90s Johnny Depp character and still shreds the hell out of “Ball and Biscuit” #SNL
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My kink is cable news fact checkers denouncing segregationist housing policies.
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...i mean

ALT billy madison idiot GIF

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Something about this Walgreen’s “must wear a mask” announcement being immediately followed by “Right Back Where We Started From” is really making me laugh.
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One last Emmy tweet: cannot wait until emmys 2022 when people finally appreciate “The Righteous Gemstones” as much as I do
Also, Zendaya and I have the same birthday (minus seven years) so it’s basically like I also won an Emmy.
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I know the Emmys are useless and irrelevant but I’ve never been as happy for anyone to win an award as I am for Jeremy Strong tonight. L to tha OG forever.
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uh does someone have a vuvuzela in the panhandle?
“my wrists are jUsT sOoOoOoOoOoOo tInY” is probably my favorite ridiculous internet brag
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“*cute pout* i’m so quirky and weird! but also thin. so delicate. basically bird bones. i wear rings as bracelets! i can barely lift my phone! but in, like, a hot way.”
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there is no drug on earth that can compete with the rush of getting an amazon fresh delivery window
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if anyone is looking for good wfh music, may i suggest my old standbys of radiohead concert recordings and/or movie scores from the mid 20th century
Hey everyone, Today’s set will be culled exclusively from 1997-2001. Please send in any and all requests from; - You Can Play These Songs With Chords - Something About Airplanes - All Time Quarterback - We Have the Facts… - The Forbidden Love e.p. - The Photo Album
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(I am obviously tuning in everyday at 4 o’clock on the dot.)
someone's looking for trouble...